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June 25th, 2010
08:37 AM ET

Dealing with the anniversary of a loved one's death

In Judaism, the Yahrzeit is the commemoration of the day of someone's death, according to the Hebrew calendar. Mourners recite the Kaddish prayer three times that day, go to synagogue and light a candle that burns for 24 hours. Outside the Jewish faith, the concept of an annual ritual to remember a loved one's death can be as simple as reading a book or having a family meal. Full Story

- CNN Belief Blog

Filed under: Faith • Traditions

soundoff (5 Responses)
  1. Honey Badger Dont Care

    ALCOHOL!

    Next problem you want solved?

    July 11, 2012 at 2:42 pm |
  2. Nilse Balthasarc

    Hello it's me Fiona, I am also visiting this site regularly, this website is in fact good and the visitors are actually sharing fastidious thoughts.

    July 11, 2012 at 2:39 pm |
  3. Jan

    Kent & Jenny, please accept my deepest condolences for your losses. August 14 will be 1 year and six months since I lost my mom to a tragic homicide by the hands of a merciless serial killer… no one saw it coming and it turned my world upside down. While you expect it to get easier... I think you just get better at dealing with it. Grief counseling has been getting me through a lot of what I deal with on a day to day basis. But it helps that my sister and I have an unbreakable bond. Hitting your early twenties without a mom is a challenge all in itself. But I tell myself to be proud that we got through this. The strength I feel and the sheer appreciation for all the little things in life has made me understand that as hard as it is to live without my mom, the new found love for life is truly a blessing in a terrible disguise. It helps to have a great support network, but I think the true healing begins within yourself and when you decide that you want to let it go, you want to move on, and you want to be happy and treasure the wonderful memories you had with your loved one.

    August 12, 2010 at 7:11 am |
  4. Jenny Young

    This month will be the aniversary of my 20 year old daughter's death and my 1st grandbaby. Shw was 71/2 month PG when a 16 year old boy hit her. Three weeks after we laid Cyndi and Keyshon to rest my ninteen year old daughter died of swine flue. It has been a unreal year. I think My husband and I have heald together pretty good. But the thought of th 22nd of Augest lays in the back of my mind as the start of two very difficulr months and tring to figure out how to have closure in the rememberence of their deaths.

    August 11, 2010 at 3:19 pm |
    • Kent Souders

      Jenny,

      My heart aches and bleeds for you and your family. We lost my 17 year old brother 52 years ago in an unexplained, or investigated, hunting 'accident.' Please don't waste your time looking for 'closure.' In instances like yours it simply can't be found. Organized religion gave us "It was God's Will and His ways are mysterious." This turned me off forever to organized religion. Nothing that horrible could possibly be the will of a caring Creator. Grief counseling simply did not exist back then. You sealed it off, never spoke of it, and you toughed it out.

      Please take advantage of any counseling and/or support groups you can find. Find a room, talk it out together, let the anger flow, cry until you are dry and exhausted, and then let it go as much as possible. Repeat when the pressure builds. Our family did none of this and we festered inside for years. After the first 25 years, my parents finally reestablished a good relationship. Please don't let yourselves suffer that way. Your children would want your suffering to be lessened and eased as much as possible.

      Find a copy of Nan Kenton's "Letting Go Prayer." It has provided me with the most comfort I have ever been able to find for dealing with the loss of a loved one.

      August 11, 2010 at 5:17 pm |
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About this blog

The CNN Belief Blog covers the faith angles of the day's biggest stories, from breaking news to politics to entertainment, fostering a global conversation about the role of religion and belief in readers' lives. It's edited by CNN's Daniel Burke with contributions from Eric Marrapodi and CNN's worldwide news gathering team.