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August 24th, 2011
10:38 AM ET

Letterman jokes about jihadist website death threat

By Ed Payne, CNN

(CNN) – Never one to miss a joke, even when it involves a threat on his life, David Letterman came armed with punchlines for Monday night's show, the first since a jihadist website urged its American followers to kill the comedian.

"Tonight, you people are ... more than an audience," Letterman said, as he opened his monologue. "You're more like a human shield."

"Backstage, I was talking to the guy from CBS, we were going through the CBS life insurance policy to see if I was covered for jihad," Letterman deadpanned.

Sticking with the theme, the comedian unveiled a "Who hates Dave" list, which starts with al Qaeda and Sarah Palin but also includes Canadians, Dave's clergyman, cats, squirrels and walruses.

Read the full story here.
- CNN Belief Blog

Filed under: Muslim • Violence

soundoff (35 Responses)
  1. Independent Thinker

    And I love how you jump in and say I'm not an independent thinker simply because I choose to engage in a debate.

    August 29, 2011 at 8:18 am |
  2. Independent Thinker

    Okay, so I'm seeing a lot of religious debate here. I'm just going to point out to whoever said that Abrahamic religions make the most sense: no religion makes any volume of sense. If you think about things with simple logic rather than trying to apply age-old faiths to arguments, it becomes immensely obvious that religion as a whole is one of the most ridiculous things ever to be presented to the human population.

    I could literally go for pages irrefutably proving that "God" has not, does not, and will never exist. Theistic arguments can be so quickly, logically, and simply disproven that it's become apparent to those of us with our own brains that theists are incapable of independent, logical thought.

    August 25, 2011 at 4:07 pm |
    • Cdub

      I loved how you called yourself an independent thinker after typing all of that like I haven't heard it from anyone else. I also love how you inject yourself into an argument when, as an "independent thinker", you could have simply let it go and not do what theists do themselves and that's tell everyone else how wrong they are. You sir are a true intellectual.

      August 25, 2011 at 8:14 pm |
  3. HappyMeal

    Mr. Letterman and his kind need to repent and ask Jesus for forgiveness. The eternal afterlife judgment is far worse than any physical loss to a human soul. No one can joke in hell but there will be only gnashing of teeth.
    "What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?" (Matthew 16:26) America needs to hear.

    August 25, 2011 at 10:33 am |
  4. Naomi

    I pray for Mr. Letterman's safety. But American comedians should really stop talking about God, religions or religious figures unless they are sincere and serious about the subject. They are abhorrent when they mock religions.

    August 25, 2011 at 1:44 am |
    • Tia

      Well God hasn't done anything about it, no one has been struck by lightening so maybe God doesn't mind it. I'm pretty sure He could do something to stop them if it was a big deal.

      August 25, 2011 at 4:45 am |
    • HappyMeal

      Tia, you are wasting God's mercy and time. Those who amuse themselves with blasphemies of those comedians are just as guilty. America is deteriorating.

      August 25, 2011 at 5:10 am |
    • JT

      But religion is a big joke to a lot of us, especially Islam and Christianity. We can't believe anyone is still actually in these cults in the day and age.

      August 25, 2011 at 8:35 am |
    • HappyMeal

      JT. Christianity and Islam make up the majority of the human population because only the Abrahamic religions make sense. Westerners are despised because they no longer respect God but blaspheme like immoral idiots.

      August 25, 2011 at 10:26 am |
  5. jazz1910

    Jihadists are such psycho, mean people I wish they would just kill themselves.

    August 24, 2011 at 11:05 pm |
  6. Reality

    Putting an end to 1400 years of Islamic Stupidity:

    The Five Steps To Deprogram 1400 Years of Islamic Myths:

    ( –The Steps take less than two minutes to finish- simply amazing, two minutes to bring peace and rationality to over one billion lost humans- Priceless!!!)

    Are you ready?

    Using "The 77 Branches of Islamic "faith" a collection compiled by Imam Bayhaqi as a starting point. In it, he explains the essential virtues that reflect true "faith" (iman) through related Qur’anic verses and Prophetic sayings." i.e. a nice summary of the Koran and Islamic beliefs.

    The First Five of the 77 Branches:

    "1. Belief in Allah"

    aka as God, Yahweh, Zeus, Jehovah, Mother Nature, etc. should be added to your cleansing neurons.

    "2. To believe that everything other than Allah was non-existent. Thereafter, Allah Most High created these things and subsequently they came into existence."

    Evolution and the Big Bang or the "Gi-b G-nab" (when the universe starts to recycle) are more plausible and the "akas" for Allah should be included if you continue to be a "crea-tionist".

    "3. To believe in the existence of angels."

    A major item for neuron cleansing. Angels/de-vils are the mythical creations of ancient civilizations, e.g. Hitt-ites, to explain/define natural events, contacts with their gods, big birds, sudden winds, protectors during the dark nights, etc. No "pretty/ug-ly wingy thingies" ever visited or talked to Mohammed, Jesus, Mary or Joseph or Joe Smith. Today we would classify angels as f–airies and "tin–ker be-lls". Modern de-vils are classified as the de-mons of the de-mented.

    "4. To believe that all the heavenly books that were sent to the different prophets are true. However, apart from the Quran, all other books are not valid anymore."

    Another major item to delete. There are no books written in the spirit state of Heaven (if there is one) just as there are no angels to write/publish/distribute them. The Koran, OT, NT etc. are simply books written by humans for humans.

    Prophets were invented by ancient scribes typically to keep the un-educated masses in line. Today we call them for-tune tellers.

    Prophecies are also invali-dated by the natural/God/Allah gifts of Free Will and Future.

    "5. To believe that all the prophets are true. However, we are commanded to follow the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him)
    alone."
    Mohammed spent thirty days "fasting" (the Ramadan legend) in a hot cave before his first contact with Allah aka God etc. via a "pretty wingy thingy". Common sense demands a neuron deletion of #5. #5 is also the major source of Islamic vi-olence i.e. turning Mohammed's "fast, hunger-driven" hallu-cinations into horrible reality for unbelievers.

    Walk these Five Steps and we guarantee a complete recovery from your Islamic ways!!!!

    Unfortunately, there are not many Muslim commentators/readers on this blog so the "two-minute" cure is not getting to those who need it. If you have a Muslim friend, send him a copy and help save the world.

    Analogous steps are available at your request for deprogramming the myths of Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, Hinduism and Paganism..

    August 24, 2011 at 3:51 pm |
  7. gro...icmc

    any one who kills over something so stupid is ah retard. oh u insulted my god or some one who i worship. get over your self. your not that improtant. and no one really cares if u get offended. ill tell u strait to your face.

    August 24, 2011 at 3:47 pm |
  8. gro...icmc

    bin ladens reward will be 72 male virgins. since he was gay. he just never knew how to express him self. thats why he was so angry all the time. so is that true for all males of the same faith as his? hmmmmm makes u wonder dont it.

    August 24, 2011 at 3:43 pm |
  9. gro...icmc

    to the people who make death threats on americans for jokes, come to my house and see what happens. or my club or my friends and fam. instead of blowing your self up like cowards why not try standing toe to toe with an american and see what happens cry babys

    August 24, 2011 at 3:40 pm |
  10. Bo

    ==========@DamianKight================= Could lool at your figures in your 12:21 post, they don't make sence. First you say that 70% of the people i the U.S. claim some kind of Christianty ant that would be about 2I0 million or 10% of the people. Make up your mind. Yesterday I read some 2008 figures they said that about 69% of the people believe in God, but only 32% attend church. My biggest surprise was that only 4% are atheist and that hasn't changed since they started taking surveys. There have been many atheist that have predicted that religion was on the way out, even Sam Harris, perhaps the best known atheist in the world, but he had to back down when his predictions didn't happen. Atheist have almost 0% (.01%) growth, while Christianty has a small groweth of about 5% I also read that the education rate of atheist is low with only about 10% having any college degrees. The largest % being science teachers in colleges and universities. To me, that means they just want to teach their doctrins.

    August 24, 2011 at 3:28 pm |
    • DamianKnight

      Bo,

      I did make up my mind. Read the entire post. 2.1 Billion Christians in the world.

      If we assume 300,000,000 (a reasonable estimate) people in the United States and 70% of those people claim to be some form of Christian, that is 210,000,000.

      Hence, 10% of the world's population of Christians are in the United States.

      August 24, 2011 at 6:15 pm |
  11. GSA

    @The Bobinator – I've heard that the ultimate trolls are the terrorists.....think about it.

    August 24, 2011 at 2:28 pm |
  12. Naomi

    What did he do to get threats? American comedians should stop joking about God and other people's religions. The Christian majority is in the non-West. It no longer belongs to Europeans and Americans. De-christianized Westterners are downright disgraceful.

    August 24, 2011 at 11:19 am |
    • The Bobinator

      > What did he do to get threats? American comedians should stop joking about God and other people's religions. The Christian majority is in the non-West. It no longer belongs to Europeans and Americans. De-christianized Westterners are downright disgraceful.

      Please don't breed. We don't need morons like you in the future. Thanks.

      August 24, 2011 at 12:15 pm |
    • The Bobinator

      PS: I'm talking about you the troll being a moron. I mean, it's not hard to troll well. You don't have the intellect for it.

      August 24, 2011 at 12:16 pm |
    • DamianKnight

      Can't speak for Europe as I'm not informed, but the United States has -never- been a major player in numbers of Christianity in respects to the world.

      Let's look at some data. 2.1 Billion (estimated) Christians in the world. The United States has roughly 300 million people in it. 70% of those claim to be some branch of Christian. That's 210 million. Or roughly 10%. That's far from a controling majority.

      August 24, 2011 at 12:21 pm |
    • Naomi

      Damian, I heard only about 10% of Americans are real Christian. Today China and Brazil have a good chunk of real Christians. Evangelicals are growing everywhere. Even in the Muslim land and in the West, though Christianity itself is weakening in the West.

      August 24, 2011 at 12:46 pm |
    • DamianKnight

      @Naomi,

      I'm not sure what your definition of "real Christian" is, but, going by your premise, only 10% are real Christian. Therefore, using the same numbers, America only has 1% of the population of Christianity, by your statement. You're sort of making my argument for me.

      August 24, 2011 at 1:00 pm |
    • Naomi

      Damian, no, only God knows. But real Christians mean practicing Christians such as going to church, having sound doctrines and so on. Among the 2.3 billion world-wide Christians, about 10% face real persecutions such as loss of job, imprisonment or even death.

      August 24, 2011 at 1:32 pm |
    • AGuest9

      "Evangelicals are growing everywhere" Yes, we who having to fight these lunatics at every turn in the public school system are well aware of their growing numbers.

      August 24, 2011 at 2:05 pm |
    • AGuest9

      s/who having/who are having/

      August 24, 2011 at 2:06 pm |
  13. tallulah13

    Those silly jihadists are probably just jealous. Comedy does more for humanity than religion.

    August 24, 2011 at 10:46 am |
    • Frogist

      @tallulah: Well it's not like extremists are well known for taking anything lightly. Or having much of a sense of humor.

      August 24, 2011 at 11:06 am |
    • Naomi

      Tall-, you think so because you are stupid. American comedy is a disease. It's not funny but stupid.

      August 24, 2011 at 11:51 am |
    • Schizophrenic Christian Squirrel

      Naomi

      Tall-, you think so because you are stupid. American comedy is a disease. It's not funny but stupid.

      -----–
      So says the resident crazy who has the sense of humor and personality of a fence post.

      August 24, 2011 at 11:55 am |
    • umm

      Naomi so you lied when you said you had to go in a previous post. Nice job!

      August 24, 2011 at 11:55 am |
    • Schizophrenic Christian Squirrel

      umm

      Naomi so you lied when you said you had to go in a previous post. Nice job!

      -----------–
      Adelina lies all the time and ignores facts and truth. It is all about her perception of reality. lol

      August 24, 2011 at 11:58 am |
    • AGuest9

      I keep waiting for her other personality to return. The one that backs up everything she says by claiming that it's in Genesis 4-6.

      August 24, 2011 at 2:09 pm |
    • gro...icmc

      amen bro

      August 24, 2011 at 3:44 pm |
  14. ....

    this is SPAM and complete junk don't bother viewing, click the report abuse link instead. What a TROLL!

    August 24, 2011 at 11:57 am |
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The CNN Belief Blog covers the faith angles of the day's biggest stories, from breaking news to politics to entertainment, fostering a global conversation about the role of religion and belief in readers' lives. It's edited by CNN's Daniel Burke with contributions from Eric Marrapodi and CNN's worldwide news gathering team.