By John Blake, CNN
(CNN) –True love doesn’t wait after all.
That’s the implication in the upcoming October issue of an evangelical magazine that claims that young, unmarried Christians are having premarital sex almost as much as their non-Christian peers.
The article in Relevant magazine, entitled “(Almost) Everyone’s Doing It,” cited several studies examining the sexual activity of single Christians. One of the biggest surprises was a December 2009 study, conducted by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, which included information on sexual activity.
While the study’s primary report did not explore religion, some additional analysis focusing on sexual activity and religious identification yielded this result: 80 percent of unmarried evangelical young adults (18 to 29) said that they have had sex - slightly less than 88 percent of unmarried adults, according to the teen pregnancy prevention organization.
The article highlights what challenges abstinence movements face. Movements such as “True Love Waits,” encourage teens to wear purity rings, sign virginity pledges and pledge chastity during public ceremonies.
Yet many of these Christian youths eventually abandon their purity pledges, Relevant’s Tyler Charles concludes in the article. Tyler talked to people like “Maria,” an evangelical woman who said she wanted to wait until marriage to have sex.
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But she said she started having sex with her college boyfriend when she turned 20 because nearly everyone, even most of her Christian friends, were having sex.
It seemed everyone in my life, older and younger, had “done it.” In fact, I waited longer than most people I knew and longer than both of my sisters, even though we were all Christians and came from a good home.
Relevant theorizes about why it’s so hard for so many young Christians to wait, including the saturation of sex in popular culture, the prevalence of pornography and a popular “do what feels good philosophy.”
Yet the article also asks a question that rarely comes up in discussions about abstinence movement. Relevant notes that in biblical times, people married earlier. The average age for marriage has been increasing in the U.S for the last 40 years.
Today, it’s not unusual to meet a Christian who is single at 30 - or 40 or 50, for that matter. So what do you tell them? Keep waiting?
Scot McKnight, author of “The Jesus Creed,” and "One.Faith: Jesus Calls, We Follow," acknowledges that young, single Christians face temptations that their counterparts in the biblical age didn’t face.
He tells Relevant:
Sociologically speaking, the one big difference – and it’s monstrous – between the biblical teaching and our culture is the arranged marriages of very young people. If you get married when you’re 13, you don’t have 15 years of temptation.
So what should a Christian parent or youth pastor do? How do they convince more young Christians to wait until marriage, or should they stop even trying?
Why they [Young Christians] are not waiting: Because the majority who don't wait are very likely to not be Christian in the first place. They are backslidden, carnal Christians.
Right. They are just like the people mentioned in the Bible that they always say "Lord, Lord", but their actions don't show any trace.
Your comment is stupid.
Maybe they just considered waiting until marriage to be a outdated tradition
Where is my post?
I've posted twice and they've disappeared. Why?
I've posted 3 times –and all have disappeared. I am reporting abuse! of me!
This site has a lot of censorship, that's why what you attempted to post didn't go through. Basically any word such as se-x gets filtered out. Welcome to N. Korea, comrade!
As you mentioned that as-yet undiscovered higher dimension, I'm sorry I have to tell you that they are NOT undiscovered. The truth is that they do exist, we don't need further investigation. Now physics is working in a higher dimensions. I can tell you that people can also draw four dimensions on two dimensions(hypercube). We are just stuck in this three dimensional space, we can't observe higher dimensional space, so it's extremely difficult for us to visualize. I think it's better for people to read more about real science before they talk about this subject.
Thank you Rick! You are absolutely 100% correct. The bible does not define morality! Christ does. The bible points to Christ not to itself. Anyone who says the Bible is the end all be all say all, immediately shuts off the current Prophet and Apostles, all of the Prophets in the Book of Mormon and all ot the writings still to come by people and their dealings with God including the lost tribes of Israel who will also have their own writings of Prophets of their days. The Bilbe even talks about lost scripture. Ex 24;7 Book of the covenant, Num 21;14 Book of the wars; Josh 10:13 Book of Jasher; I'll skip references so here goes, Book of Nathan the Prophet, Book of the Acts of Solomon, Book of Samuel the seer, Book of Shemaiah, Iddo the Prophet, Book of Jehu, and the list goes on and on. Clearly there is a lot more than the Bible.
"Thank you Rick! "
"You are absolutely 100% correct."
I've been telling my significant other that for years, but she seems reluctant to accept this truism
"The bible does not define morality! Christ does."
So, do you feel that only Christians can be moral?
"Clearly there is a lot more than the Bible."
I know I had some typos and it makes everything more confusing. See? We are just so limit, at least I am.
So I changed the errors I found...
As for those who proclaiming NO GOD, aren't they saying things because they can't imagine Him? Is that acceptable? I'm not trying to force people to believe. I just think it was silly to ask for evidence to prove He is real. Of course I never found it interesting to try to match things unreasonably, that's why I said it was silly to use 2nd law of thermodynamics to prove the evolution is unreal. I definitely don't believe in evolution, but the entropy is not directly against evolution either. My point is we are so limit, but how can we be so sure that there is NO GOD? Even in the universe, it's made up mostly by dark matters which don't emit any forms of electromagnetic waves. All people can see things around us is just because of the visible light which is not even 5% on the spectrum. I mean most of things in this universe, we CAN'T see. I bet more than half of the population know nothing about dark matter or dark energy. They are just sitting there saying "No God" or "Give me evidence of God"... to me it's just dumb. Just get up, read some science magazines.
how do you make the jump from a creator to a judge of human actions?
For a better understanding, I'll clarify: ("->" means "leads to...")
people don't read-> they don't know anything-> they don't realize how limit they are-> they think they are the best--> pride-> against God
As for those who proclaiming NO GOD, aren't they saying things because they can't imagine Him? Is that acceptable? I'm not trying to force people to believe. I just think it was silly to ask for evidence to prove He is not real. Of course I never found it interesting to try to match things unreasonably, that's why I said it was silly to use 2nd law of thermodynamics to prove the evolution is unreal. I definitely don'e believe in evolution, but the entropy is not directly against evolution either. My point is we are so limit, but how can we be so sure that there is NO GOD? Even in the universe, it's made up mostly by dark matters which don't emit any forms of electromagnetic waves. All people can see things around us is just because of the visible light which is not even 5% on the spectrum. I mean most of things in this universe, we CAN'T see. I bet more than half of the population know nothing about dark matter or dark energy. They are just sitting there saying "No God" or "Give me evidence of God"... to me it's just dumb. Just get up, read some science magazines.
science is a proof a in your face cold hearted subject. science deals with many great things . medicine for one . however ther are also many scientists who are christians or hold a strong belief in a higher power . Folk become adjitated at the thought that a scientist can actually have a religious soul spirit belief vs a scientific mind. both different .
Sorry I didn't get you, but I made typos in this comment. I believe in Higher power. Science, to me, definitely proves the Higher Power. That was my point. I actually posted my comments again without those typos.
I have more to say from thermodynamics perspectives (not the second law of thermodynamics, it's silly I know) if you can give me some of your evidence and if you would like to hear. I'm all ears... Good luck!
I waited until I was married. It wasn't that hard.
Let people decide what is right for them – who cares if "everyone is doing it" or who cares if someone decides to wait for personal or religious reasons.
Everyone has a different story and different beliefs- the only one who will judge us is God.
I respect you for your wise decisions.
Perhaps, but which one?
I also commend you for this belief.
It's nice to see so many waited and did what has commonly been known and held true in countless societies - and it's wiser still you did it in a world full of mixed emotions that often promotes beliefs contrary to this one that cause much human suffering.
I'm so sick of the people here pretending they know everything while asking the dumbest question EVER!!! As a physicist, I see how amazing the universe is and I see how limit we human are. As an engineer, I see how much we can do comparing with other species, and I see God's favor in us. Yes I am a physicist and engineer. I'm not a Christian but I believe when God talks about people being proud because everyday I encounter the people who are just so arrogant while they can't answer the simplest questions. Everything about human in Bible is just so true. So people just stop asking and believing in stupid things, just use whatever is in your head that God gives you, is that so difficult ? Will that kill you?
"So people just stop asking and believing in stupid things, just use whatever is in your head that God gives you, is that so difficult ?"
Perhaps one of the hings people should stop believing is that the "word of god" is contained in texts written, edited and translated by man
Yes: did you come from a Christian family out of curiosity?
I once was a Christian but I was not born in a Christian family. I'm not anymore, but I still do believe in Higher Power.
I just saw your other comments (replying mine). Thank you! I'm really not intelligent. Just due to what I said here is so small amount comparing to what we don't know.
I understand what you said about this world in a deep trouble. I believe that it definitely is, and probably even worse then what we thought. My interest is not in this article but people's comments and see how sick our society can be. Apparently lots of people are blind due to the influence of our culture.
One more thing – if I were an eternal all-knowing being a.k.a God, I dont't hink I would have a clue about reproduction functions or any concerns about it. Yes, I would want my "sheep" (loving) be nice to each other and not harm each other but to say anything about reproduction habits would be just too much macro-managing for a God who doesn't need to reproduce himself/ herself.
now that is the best point yet ...lolol
What do we tell them? "Stop postponing marriage! Make seeking a life-long or eternal companion with whom you'll raise children a priority greater than your career, your bank account, or your entertainment. "
Are you sure you are going to meet the companion for life right there in your local high-school and be able to lvie with that person for the next 70 years?
Surprise: Christians are hypocrites. Tell us something we didn't know already.
"Christians are hypocrites"
Hypocrites are not Christians although many hypocrites claim to be. (ie Roman Catholics, Orthodox, Protestant believers, thousands of other churches.)
so, mcore, those you mentioned (catholic, orthodox, etc) are hypocrites?
True Christians aren't hypocrites. Hypocrites are the ones who want people to THINK they are Christians. They are nothing but those wolves in sheeps clothing you hear about.
Nope- just sinners. And forgiven
Not all hypocrites are Christians, and not all Christians are hypocrites. It bothers me when Christians claim a monopoly on morality; I know many moral atheists and non-Christians, and those overly-broad claims give rise to some of the most vociferous anti-Christian sentiments. While Christians don't have a monopoly on morality – and in fact many Christians have moral deficiencies (a basic tenet of Christianity is that all people are sinners), they do not have a monopoly on hypocrisy or self-aggrandizement. Is Richard Dawkins or Chris Hitchens shy about telling anyone what they should or should not believe?
Acting in a way that differs from one's professed opinions or beliefs is just part of the human condition. New experiences or opportunities (one may or may not call these temptations) present themselves, and we respond; stronger beliefs affect how we respond, but they do not always determine it. In short, people are people, and inadvertant hypocrisy is part of the package.
When society is desensitized to virtues and values around se x , marriage, divorce etc., it loses its essence.
Christians are called to be the salt and light of the world, of what value is salt if it has lost its flavor?
Those virtues are what sets the believer apart from the rest. Live those values! May God so help you!
Your religion tries to undo millions of years of evolution by denying a natural, healthy, physical drive. You might as well try to stop people from eating.
A healthy, natural drive, huh? You realise your 'healthy, natural' drive has literally caused acknowledgment of only two STDs but a few decades ago, to over fifty today? Hell, I can't even find the article now.
"Christians are called to be the salt and light of the world..."
Sure, by themselves
KS: Do you dispute that it is a healthy, natural drive? If so, what are the reasons?
Rick did you even read what I posted beyond the first few words?
@ KS I definitely agree with you. Don't worry about that Rick. He is just somebody sitting by the computer doing nothing all day. Just try to justify his "natural drive" while he can't even read.
@ KS By the way, I don't even bother answering any of his questions. Most of my posts are my personal views through science while his replies were nothing logic or scientific. Everything he said is pretty much the same. He only wants to set his standards as human standards without knowing he is no better than anybody else here.
Yes: I really admire your beliefs and wisdom. You're also very intelligent.
I for one am actually glad, believe it or not, to see that some groups are becoming increasingly marginalised and united in their beliefs against a common enemy.
Also, the UK recently passed and upheld a ruling that basically states you can't refuse anyone service for any reason (be it they're black, Jewish, extremely mentally deranged or anything else). See the Christian Hotelier case on The Guardian and read some of the comments; the world's in for some deep trouble.
Oops, didn't mean to say *also. Meant *for instance.
I'm no better than anybody else here, but thank you for the compliments. Out of curiosity, what is your belief? Are you from a Christian family? By the way, I do respect everything you said here and your courage to speak up.
I'm so glad that faith isn't real anymore and I can finally give into my urges to kill anyone who disagrees with me. To think that I've been duped into believing it was wrong for all these years. thank you for giving me the clarity that I couldn't find by myself. My goodness, I never realized how old fashioned it is to believe in God. Wonder what He thinks?????
Civil law and natural consequences are quite effective in curbing your destructive urges and actions... perhaps more effective, considering the number of 'believers' who are in prisons and who suffer from their misdoings in other ways.
There is not a shred of evidence for any eternal consequences.
"I'm so glad that faith isn't real anymore and I can finally give into my urges to kill anyone who disagrees with me"
It's pathetic that you think that man (as "created by God in his image") is of such low intelligence that he needs bribes (heaven) and threats (hell) to keep him from killing "anyone who disagrees with me".
Most often, those that lack any reasonable argument whatsoever resort to extreme uses of hyperbole to illustrate their point... ironically enough all this really does is make them look foolish and further prove they have no logical grounds to stand on.
You did that perfectly. Thanks for playing.
Maybe it is harder to wait now, but it is still worth it. Waiting on God is always the best way, it doesn't matter if times have changed. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and that doesn't mean that we can change His Word to fit our culture! And truly, if you know, love, serve, and honor Christ, you won't be become lonely because you lack an earthly relationship. We're called to be set apart, not to distort Christ's Word in order to make it sound more appealing.
"Relevant theorizes about why it’s so hard for so many young Christians to wait"
Being a single christian myself, I know the struggles single Christians share and sadly have seen many backslide due to frustration of "waiting on God". Being that my church is very conservative, we don't encourage people of our sect to marry Christians of other denominations, nor do we encourage online dating, or women "hitting on men". Unfortunately, the male to female ration in our district is highly skewed resulting in a high number of single females who have been waiting for years, some of whom suffer from depression due to loneliness, myself being one of them. While the word of God does not change, times have changed. In biblical times people did marry early, and many marriages were arranged, so the people did not have the burden of trying to find a partner like we do today. Not only that, people today marry for love or attraction rather than choosing to love the person they are with. Because of this I understand the plight of single Christians don't feel the need to judge Christians who have fallen to temptation as waiting on God is not easy.
"While the word of God does not change, times have changed."
Maybe the "word of God" does change, but it is not reflected in the printed page
Of course the word of God changes. In the Old Testament he said to go around killing unruly kids, blasphemers, adulterers, people working on the Sabbath, etc. In the New Testament, he changed his mind and you aren't supposed to do that anymore. Jesus directly contradicted some of what God said andGod even changed his mind about punishing others for the sins of ancestors.
Be like every Christian and have your own interpretation. Just don't use it to deny others equal rights.
Please keep your obvious dislike for Christians and Christianity out of this. Its pathetic to hear people talk about the bible when they don't even read it. If you bothered to read the word, you would know Jesus said " I've have not come to do away with the law(old testament), but to fulfill it." I choose to wait. That is my choice and what I know to be right. What you decide is your business. In my post I said it not my business to judge, keep your judgement and mockery to yourself.
Please know there is a difference between the word of God changing and people who call themselves Christians choosing to distort the word of god for their own personal motives. Just so you know the bible says, "In the beginning there was the word and the word was with God". Meaning the biblical rules we see on printed page were Gods will before time began. Hope this helps.
I'm always glad to see people here explaining why the "Christians" didn't wait. You are right true Christians follow Christ and they don't distort God's Words. I respect your courage!
Well if the Bible no longer defines morality, perhaps we can take it to a vote. Only, we need to make sure that God does not get asked to vote on this one with us. I don't think he is going to have much sympathy that we are now giving in because it is such a big temptation. Besides, why shouldn't we decide what is moral? We can simply gauge what is moral by the things we find that are too hard to resist. Then we modify the laws of the land to fit the new morality as well. The basis is, If we want it really really bad for a long long time, then we make it moral by a vote of the majority and start doing it with free consciences. Surely there will be no other consequences for taking over morality and keeping God out of the subject. He just put morality there to hamper our happiness didn't he?
Your inability to accept the truism that is moral relativism demonstrates your lack of knowledge about sociology – not to mention history.
God is not the arbitor of morality – were that true, then everybody would have always agreed on right/wrong.
Sin lies only in harming other unnecessarily.
All other sin is invented nonsense.
I know what you mean! God knows how I miserable it makes me to know that some people are doing things that I don’t like out there somewhere in a way that does not affect me at all! We have just GOT to put a stop to people exercising their personal liberty in ways our church doesn’t approve of, because that’s not what liberty or free will are all about, right?
Or, we can just continue to define 21st century morality by the ramblings of bronze age sheep herders
@Doc Vestibule – I think you're inability to accept the truism that moral relativism is an absolutism demonstrates your lack of knowledge about epistemology.
Also, I think you contradicted yourself by saying "God is not the arbitor of morality – were that true, then everybody would have always agreed on right/wrong. Sin lies only in harming other unnecessarily." You negate God's universal authority by assuming if he had universal authority then everyone would completely agree on what sin is. And yet you proffer your own universal standard of Sin- that is "Sin only lies in harming others unnecessarily."
But you just said everyone doesn't agree on what sin is; so how can I trust that what you are saying about sin is true?
Also, Screwtape, the bible NEVER defined morality for those who do not accept it's authority
Perhaps you are right, there is no such thing as truth. We live and dance on a clay planet to disappear into nothingness. Therefore live it up while you can, because you are going to die soon. Life is about as much enjoyment as you can possibly absorb as fast and as often as you can. It is about what you can sense and feel only. Your simply a very evolved plant.
Morality is an invention of society to keep us from killing and raping each other. Short of that, it has no purpose. Right and wrong is not something we need to be worried about. There is no afterlife, and there is no judgement. That ancient book has no truths in it, we can prove that because we can find human mistakes in it.
I suggest that you bet your live and your soul on those facts. If your wrong later, tell them I lied to you and you unfortunately believed it.
"Morality is an invention of society to keep us from killing and raping each other. Short of that, it has no purpose. Right and wrong is not something we need to be worried about."
It's the believers that imagine that morality must be based on bribes (heaven) and threats (hell). For some reason they can't comprehend that people can believe that often similar morality can be based on logic and the idea that we should do what is best for mankind. Such ignorance by believers cannot begin to explain why the most brilliant atheists do not advocate immorality for all.
Screwtape, I definitely like what you said. They are just so darn true!
Your inability to form your own thoughts, reason or demonstrate discretion to any extent required in higher-thinking life forms ought to not only be considered a crime, but one punishable by death.
KS shows us exactly what being a christian is all about! Hated and the desire to kill anyone who disagrees with them!
My comment was censored out. Who said I was a Christian?
KS - these hints might help to find why your post was blocked...
Bad letter combinations / words to avoid if you want to get past the CNN automatic filter:
Many, if not most, are buried within other words, so use your imagination.
You can use dashes, spaces, or other characters to modify the "offending" letter combinations.
ar-se.....as in ar-senic.
co-ck.....as in co-ckatiel, co-ckatrice, co-ckleshell, co-ckles, etc.
co-on.....as in rac-oon, coc-oon, etc.
cu-m......as in doc-ument, accu-mulate, circu-mnavigate, circu-mstances, cu-mbersome, cuc-umber, etc.
cu-nt.....as in Scu-ntthorpe, a city in the UK famous for having problems with filters...!
ef-fing...as in ef-fing filter
ft-w......as in soft-ware, delft-ware, swift-water, drift-wood, etc.
ho-mo.....as in ho-mo sapiens or ho-mose-xual, ho-mogenous, etc.
ho-rny....as in tho-rny, etc.
jacka-ss...yet "ass" is allowed by itself.....
ja-p......as in j-apanese, ja-pan, j-ape, etc.
koo-ch....as in koo-chie koo..!
o-rgy….as in po-rgy, zo-rgy, etc.
pi-s......as in pi-stol, lapi-s, pi-ssed, therapi-st, etc.
p-orn… as in p-ornography
pr-ick....as in pri-ckling, pri-ckles, etc.
ra-pe.....as in scra-pe, tra-peze, gr-ape, thera-peutic, sara-pe, etc.
se-x......as in Ess-ex, s-exual, etc.
sh-@t.....but shat is okay – don't use the @ symbol there.
sp-ic.....as in disp-icable, hosp-ice, consp-icuous, susp-icious, sp-icule, sp-ice, etc.
sp-ook… as in sp-ooky, sp-ooked
ti-t......as in const-itution, att-itude, ent-ities, alt-itude, beat-itude, etc.
tw-at.....as in wristw-atch, nightw-atchman, etc.
va-g......as in extrava-gant, va-gina, va-grant, va-gue, sava-ge, etc.
who-re....as in who're you kidding / don't forget to put in that apostrophe!
There are more, some of them considered "racist", so do not assume that this list is complete.
Tallulah, and who said I wanted to kill anyone you degenerate western wh*re?
btw, your absence of a simple "Thank You" to me for digging up that list for you speaks volumes.
No matter, the fact that you made an a-ss out of yourself is gratifying in itself.
I say thank you for KS. I respect his/her views. He was probably so glad that he forgets (we are all human). Your hints do help everybody here. Thank you for taking the time to post it.
„So what do you tell them? Keep waiting?“ And why not to tell this if it is a right thing to do? A bit funny article.
No matter how you spin it, "faith" is just nature through a funnel. Eventually all the juices will come through.
The CNN Belief Blog covers the faith angles of the day's biggest stories, from breaking news to politics to entertainment, fostering a global conversation about the role of religion and belief in readers' lives. It's edited by CNN's Daniel Burke with contributions from Eric Marrapodi and CNN's worldwide news gathering team.