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Why young Christians aren't waiting anymore
A young Christian at an purity rally spreads the word.
September 27th, 2011
08:39 AM ET

Why young Christians aren't waiting anymore

By John Blake,  CNN

(CNN) –True love doesn’t wait after all.

That’s the implication in the upcoming October issue of an evangelical magazine that claims that young, unmarried Christians are having premarital sex almost as much as their non-Christian peers.

The article in Relevant magazine, entitled “(Almost) Everyone’s Doing It,” cited several studies examining the sexual activity of single Christians. One of the biggest surprises was a December 2009 study, conducted by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, which included information on sexual activity.

While the study’s primary report did not explore religion, some additional analysis focusing on sexual activity and religious identification yielded this result: 80 percent of unmarried evangelical young adults (18 to 29) said that they have had sex - slightly less than 88 percent of unmarried adults, according to the teen pregnancy prevention organization.

The article highlights what challenges abstinence movements face. Movements such as “True Love Waits,” encourage teens to wear purity rings, sign virginity pledges and pledge chastity during public ceremonies.

Yet many of these Christian youths eventually abandon their purity pledges, Relevant’s Tyler Charles concludes in the article. Tyler talked to people like “Maria,” an evangelical woman who said she wanted to wait until marriage to have sex.

CNN's Belief Blog – all the faith angles to the day's top stories

But she said she started having sex with her college boyfriend when she turned 20 because nearly everyone, even most of  her Christian friends, were having sex.

Maria:

It seemed everyone in my life, older and younger, had “done it.” In fact, I waited longer than most people I knew and longer than both of my sisters, even though we were all Christians and came from a good home.

Relevant theorizes about why it’s so hard for so many young Christians to wait, including the saturation of sex in popular culture, the prevalence of pornography and a popular “do what feels good philosophy.”

Yet the article also asks a question that rarely comes up in discussions about abstinence movement. Relevant notes that in biblical times, people married earlier. The average age for marriage has been increasing in the U.S for the last 40 years.

Today, it’s not unusual to meet a Christian who is single at 30 - or 40 or 50, for that matter. So what do you tell them? Keep waiting?

Scot McKnight, author of “The Jesus Creed,” and "One.Faith: Jesus Calls, We Follow," acknowledges that young, single Christians face temptations that their counterparts in the biblical age didn’t face.

He  tells Relevant:

Sociologically speaking, the one big difference – and it’s monstrous – between the biblical teaching and our culture is the arranged marriages of very young people. If you get married when you’re 13, you don’t have 15 years of temptation.

So what should a Christian parent or youth pastor do? How do they convince more young Christians to wait until marriage, or should they stop even trying?

- CNN Writer

Filed under: Belief • Christianity • Church • Culture & Science • Culture wars

soundoff (5,768 Responses)
  1. George2

    God doesn't exist. Are you people really that stupid?

    December 11, 2011 at 11:24 am |
  2. nytw

    Just another example of liberals telling people how they should live their lives. When will liberals admit that in America WE, The People have the freedom and liberty to live our lives the way we desire.

    December 11, 2011 at 11:08 am |
    • Rick

      psuedo conservatives tell people how to live their lives, too. our own little georgie boy, the ultraconservative jesus follower, wants old testament prohibitions codified into law

      December 11, 2011 at 11:51 am |
    • Rick

      How is this article telling others how to live their lives? It seems to me that that is the province of the social conservative, who then use empty proxy threat of hell to keep people scared and in line

      December 11, 2011 at 11:58 am |
    • nonbeliever

      @nytw-

      Ironic really. All the conservative christians on here telling us we are going to hell and need to repent for having se.xu.al relations before marriage. And here you are, blaming it on liberbal propaganda? Saying that liberals are trying to tell people how to live? This article is telling how people ACTUALLY live, not how to. This is the problem with conservatives, they can't even understand what it is they are really reading. This article, is done in response to an article Relevant Magazine (a christian magazine) did on the study. It wasn't even initiated by CNN. But, apparently instead of using your brain, you decided to just blame liberals. This is why nothing gets done in this country. Too many conservatives can't even take the time to reason, they just blame it all on something that isn't even factual.

      December 11, 2011 at 12:49 pm |
  3. jon

    You can sum of the whole 1000 word article with "decay of American society due to 100 years of liberalism"

    December 11, 2011 at 7:43 am |
    • nonbeliever

      You can sum up your whole 18 word (20 if you count the numbers) statement in three words:

      You're an id.iot.

      December 11, 2011 at 7:56 am |
  4. Martin

    Fornication is not good good for the body nor the mind.

    All Christians-Your body is a temple of the living God and we are accountable for how it is treated.

    December 10, 2011 at 3:24 pm |
    • George

      Amen, Martin.

      December 10, 2011 at 3:38 pm |
    • HotAirAce

      What's your cult's penalty for fornication? Are you ensuring that it is appled in all cases? Or are you practicing moral relativism?

      December 10, 2011 at 3:41 pm |
    • Rick

      Really, Martin? So, I suspect then that they avoid alcohol, tobacco, caffeine, illicit drugs, pharmaceutical abuse......right?

      December 10, 2011 at 4:08 pm |
    • Caleb

      Ricky/Hota-r u guys Christian?
      if you are not, enjoy your fornication and spread STD's as much as you want.

      Enjoy your STD's ;)

      December 10, 2011 at 4:35 pm |
    • Bale

      Try slippin' in it, and tell me it isn't awesome...C in P 4eva.

      December 11, 2011 at 12:36 am |
    • George

      It is sin, pure and simple. As I mentioned earlier, a lot of people are burning in hell because of s.e.x.ual sin.

      December 11, 2011 at 1:04 am |
    • Rick

      Caleb: I am in a long term monogomous relationship. No spreading of STDs here. Sorry to disappoint you.

      December 11, 2011 at 5:02 am |
    • nonbeliever

      @Caleb-

      You do realize that christians can get STD's too, right? There isn't some magical gift in being a 'believer' that keeps it from happening. You know that right? And that in reality, christians are the main reason there has been a spread of STD's and teen pregnancy in this country. When you teach children about 'waiting' instead of how to be safe if you don't, then YOU become the reason that STD numbers grow higher. Fortunately I had parents that actually loved me and educated me on how to use protection to keep myself from getting sick or a girl pregnant. So I was able to enjoy my se.xual realtionships with peace of mind and when I met my wife, we were both clean.

      December 11, 2011 at 7:32 am |
    • Hans

      Silly, naive, Americans, I feel sorry for you.

      December 11, 2011 at 9:34 am |
  5. Jose

    Waiting until the wedding night is a terrible way to find out that you are committed to spending the rest of your life with a man who has a quick trigger or small willy. Finding a mate is like buying a car. You need to drive it around the block a few times to be sure it's what you really want.

    December 10, 2011 at 1:09 pm |
    • just sayin

      Comparing your spouse to a car? so what did you do with that fully depreciated car of yours? oops, sorry spouse of yours?

      December 10, 2011 at 3:19 pm |
    • Rick

      perhaps on the wedding night, she will find out that he only wants to get himself off and not care a whit about his spouse

      December 10, 2011 at 4:11 pm |
    • jc

      R U KIdding me?

      December 11, 2011 at 7:40 am |
    • Max

      Jose, u must be gay....worrying about a quck trigger and small willy's

      December 11, 2011 at 12:01 pm |
  6. Martha

    Why aren't they waiting? Simple answer: it feels really, really good.

    December 10, 2011 at 10:55 am |
  7. nonbeliever

    For George-

    A few questions, that I would sincerely like answers to. You seem to be a devout follower of christianity. You say that your gods law is absolute and that you should follow everything according to the morality that god has put in front of us through his bible. I would just like your feedback on a few biblical questions:

    Have you ever stolen anything? Have you ever flipped anyone off? Have you ever mast.er.bat.ed? Have you taken candy or a cookie any kind of food when your parents told you not to? Have you disobeyed your parents or authority figures and touched things you weren't supposed to or played with your toys when you weren't supposed to? Have you ever sinned in anyway with your hands? According to your bible no one is perfect so I'm sure you have.

    Have you ever looked at a woman in lu.st? Have you ever looked at something and wanted it so greedily, even though you knew it wasn't good for you? Have you ever looked down on someone and thought you were better than them because of your pride? Have you ever used your eyes to sin? I'm sure you have.

    My question now, do you still have your hands and your eyes?

    Matthew 5:29-30 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into he.ll. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into he.ll.

    I'll include your feet as well (Mark 9:45), but I'm sure you get my point now.

    Now, it's quite obvious you still have a computer and internet access. I'm assuming you probably make decent money in the job you work if you have one. So, why do you still have possessions? Your god told his followers to sell everything they had and to follow him. Do you think it's wrong to disobey?

    Luke 18:22- When Jesus heard this, he said to him, "You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

    Or here are some good Old Testament laws, that christianity never really gets into and as far as my research has found have NEVER been considered 'moral' or law of society in America.

    -The eating of fat is prohibited forever. (Lev 3:17)
    -You cannot round the corners of your beard or the hair on your temples. (Lev 19:27)
    -The congregation was to be a bas.tard free zone. The bible was so dead set against bast.ards that their children, even to the tenth generation, could not enter the assembly of god. (Duet 23:2) This is in keeping with god's principle of punishing children for the wrongdoings of their parents.
    -Handicapped people could not approach god. Their presence would profane his sanctuary. (Lev 21:16-23) This scripture single-handedly offends almost every category of handicapped persons you can name. The blind, lame, injured, hunchbacks and dwarfs are specifically named. If anyone is left out, the catchall phrase "anyone with a blemish" is thrown in to cover them.
    -Entrance into the assembly of the lord was granted only to those with complete test.icles. (Duet 23:1)
    -Anyone working on the Sabbath is to be killed. (Ex 35:2)
    -Menstruating women and everything they touch are unclean. The only cure for this uncleanness was for the priest to kill a couple of pigeons. (Lev 15:19-30)
    -If a woman grabs a man's privates during a fight, her hand is to be cut off. (Duet 25:11,12)
    -Stubborn children were to be stoned, and the stoning was to be instigated by their parents. (Duet 21:18-21)

    I'm interested in how you feel about these biblical morals not being law? I could list so many more, but these are obviously my most favorite.

    Your response is requested, George.

    December 10, 2011 at 8:24 am |
    • George

      Indeed some of that SHOULD be made into law.

      You see the difference between Christians and those bound by the entire OT is that the death of Jesus has paid the price for some of the more brutal punishments in the OT. However, I agree, we need more of the OT codified into law.

      December 10, 2011 at 3:36 pm |
    • nonbeliever

      You still neglected my main questions (yet again).

      Do you still have your right hand, eye, and foot? Do you still have your possessions?

      You are sinning against your jesus right now, if you do.

      December 10, 2011 at 3:41 pm |
    • nonbeliever

      @George-

      You can't have it both ways. You, according to everything you've said about the bible being 'gods law' cannot pick and choose what you believe should be considered law. You have stated, multiple times, that the bible should be the basis for law. These are commandments in your bible, if you don't believe they should ALL be law, then you are sinning against your god.

      I hope you enjoy your firey hole that you, in your own words, are going to because you don't believe all of your gods commandments should be law.

      You are a hypocrite for having your hands, feet, and eyes. You are a hypocrite for owning a computer. According to you, you are no better than me.

      I just sleep better at night not feeling all the 'pressure' to be perfect.

      December 11, 2011 at 8:03 am |
    • Rick

      Tell us, Georgie Boy, which one of those should be made into law?

      December 11, 2011 at 10:16 am |
  8. Gayle

    I'll add that my hubby and I married as teens. We'll have been married 41 years in the spring. I only wish that every Christian couple could have something like what God gave to us. It only gets better as our love for the Lord, God's Word, and each other deepens. Jesus is our cement. And I praise His holy name for His amazing grace and wondrous gifts. Truly, thank You, Lord.

    December 10, 2011 at 7:51 am |
    • Rebecca

      Gail... odds are 10 to 1 your husband has only been faithful because he could not convince some single women to allow him to "serve her needs." Do they teach this language in Bible Study? Having been single in the Christian community for most of 40 years (adult) I have consistently been slimed by your married Christian men. Their wives are all spouting nonsense about their "great" marriage of bazillion years. Great like Mrs. Herman Cain's marriage.

      December 12, 2011 at 9:32 am |
  9. Gayle

    God does expect self-control even if marriage happens late or not at all. Our daughter, for example, has waited a long time to offer her first kiss to the right man. She is fast approaching 40 and is proudly a virgin. Her cousin who is almost 40 was a virgin when she married this past summer. Every young woman in her bridal party–mostly in their 30's–were all virgins, I was told. The sad thing is that none of them can find men who have a similar character and maturity. Parents in my generation have done a very poor job of raising their sons, with small exception.

    December 10, 2011 at 7:28 am |
    • nonbeliever

      Choosing to not wait to have se.x before you are married has nothing to do with your character or maturity. THAT is the problem with your generation. You see yourself as better than the rest of American's who aren't christians or who choose not to wait. Humility is obviously not taught in your church. Christians are to blame for rampant levels of teen pregnancy and the spreading of STDs. You tell your children to wait, instead of educating them how to be safe in their se.xu.al practices. It's quite obvious that the majority of American's are not going to choose to wait, that cannot be changed. But what can be changed, what can help the future generations is being educated properly and not taught lies in church and in schools.

      I applaud those who choose to wait, that is their choice. But don't judge me because my wife and I chose not to. We are of no lesser character and maturity than you. If anything, I look down upon christians who judge, when they are obviously commanded not to.

      December 10, 2011 at 8:37 am |
  10. Liam

    Please research "Theology of the Body" and "Love and Responsibility" written by Blessed Pope John Paul II. If you're a Christian, it will resonate with your faith. If you are not a Christian, it will resonate with your humanity.

    December 10, 2011 at 4:01 am |
  11. Steve

    Rick,

    Morality is a perception.

    George can claim whatever he likes.

    So can you or I.

    E.g the entire country can claim to be your biological sister (the entire country being males, females and everything in between).

    Are they?

    Worry less about this guy, please.

    December 9, 2011 at 9:30 pm |
    • George

      "Morality is a perception."

      Tells it all right there folks. You can't get anymore antisocial than that. It makes it crystal clear that atheists have no morals.

      December 9, 2011 at 11:38 pm |
    • Steve

      George,

      Are you purposely trying to cause conflict for no reason?

      If this is a legitimate question, then:

      Focus on your own church of 80-99%ers, please.

      December 10, 2011 at 1:18 am |
    • Rick

      Steve: You are right. George is one of those chosen people who take their moral guidance from the plagarism of bronze age sheep sodomizers.

      December 10, 2011 at 12:38 pm |
    • tallulah13

      "It makes it crystal clear that atheists have no morals."

      The fact that you take the response of an individual and apply it to an entire group of strangers shows that you are a liar, George. Isn't there something in your bible that says that lying is bad? What does this lie say about your own morals? You are no better than those you seek to judge, George.

      December 10, 2011 at 6:34 pm |
  12. Bruce McGlory

    "I do not think that Newt will get the nomination. But if he does, I will vote for him as the lesser of two evils."

    The guy that is three times divorced – after abandoning a terminally ill wife, is the LESSER of two evils?

    GET SOME HELP BEFORE YOU HURT SOMEONE.

    December 9, 2011 at 4:49 pm |
    • Josie Abbott

      Hey Bruce, Get your facts straight BEFORE you start judging Gingrich. He did NOT abandon a terminally ill wife. According to the daughter (who loves both her parents), it was her Mother who asked Newt for a divorce LONG BEFORE SHE WENT INTO THE HOSPITAL FOR A CHECK UP WHERE A TUMOR WAS DISCOVERED THAT WAS LATER DETERMINED TO BE BENIGN. We make fools of ourselves Bruce when we don't bother to check out the facts and ONLY consider the lame stream media for info. Yes, Newt cheated and for that he's wrong, but FDR had his mistress two doors down from his wife Eleanor and he was elected 4 times. Bill Clinton couldn't pass up a skirt in didn't lift, but ran the country decently. (we had a surplus instead of a deficit).

      December 10, 2011 at 12:43 am |
    • Rebecca

      Josie: how about how Newtie has cheated on his country and was kicked out of Congress for ethics violations? The man is a sleaze.

      December 12, 2011 at 9:35 am |
    • Lenissongui

      The guidelines you prdovied listed below are extremely precious. It been found this type of pleasurable surprise to obtain that expecting me when I woke up today. They’re constantly to the issue easy to learn. Thanks a large amount for any valuable ideas you’ve got shared right here.

      October 7, 2012 at 6:13 pm |
  13. George

    When I was in church on Wednesday, I picked up a pamphlet about this very topic. I decided to summarize it here:

    The body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and should not be defiled by s.e.x.ual immorality. Respect your body and you respect God. Here are five important steps to help you remain chaste:

    1. Modesty. Many Christians don't adhere to modesty. Modesty means dresses below the knee, loose pants on men and women, no low-cut tops, and shorts should be knee-length for both men and women.

    2. Limit all displays of affection to a simple kiss – no lip-locking, no French kissing, no heavy petting. This type of behavior before marriage leads many down the primrose path to hell.

    3. Self-Control – learn self control in all areas of your life and it will bleed over to self control in s.e.xual matters also. For example, keep a healthy diet and get regular exercise.

    4. Avoid being alone for extended periods – take your dates in public places and don't hang out at each other's living quarters unless surrounded by friends or family.

    5. When temptation hits, pray. Remember s.e.x outside of the God-given bonds of matrimony between a man and a woman is ugly, sinful, and of the devil.

    December 8, 2011 at 11:23 pm |
    • Rick

      Remember, anyone who claims to know the likes and dislikes of "God" is delusional and should be and should be heavily medicated. Georgie here is Exhibit A

      December 9, 2011 at 4:39 am |
    • Steve

      George, while I appreciate your effort, see my post below.

      The real statistic is closer to 99%, not 80% as cited in the article among Christians - search any dating site or even ask around.

      No point in wasting your breath.

      Yet 45% of the country attends church regularly.

      December 9, 2011 at 4:47 am |
    • nonbeliever

      @Steve-

      Don't exercise too much effort with george here, he is slightly gone in the head. He is one of those 'christians' that cannot grasp any idea of reason and he wont take the time to answer the simple questions that I have laid out before him. That stems from the fact that he either knows that I am right or he just flat out cannot answer the questions. Either way, he claimed earlier that if a priest and a nun were caught having se.x that someone should call the police and have them arrested. Like I said, dillusional. Your effort is better off spent in other places.

      December 9, 2011 at 7:28 am |
    • Will Duffield

      You're a maniac.

      Remember religion is like racism, it's a learned behavior and it can be unlearned.

      December 9, 2011 at 12:35 pm |
    • Rick

      @George-Excellent Points!

      December 9, 2011 at 12:42 pm |
    • George

      @nonbeliever

      "he claimed earlier that if a priest and a nun were caught having se.x that someone should call the police and have them arrested"

      This is a blatant lie. I never claimed any such thing. I said that they should be reported to the authorities which in the case of a priest or nun is a bishop or archbishop.

      December 9, 2011 at 2:40 pm |
    • George

      @Steve

      "The real statistic is closer to 99%"

      And you know that by looking at dating sites and by asking around. Wow. Anectdotal evidence, anyone? It never ceases to amaze me how people want to ascribe their immorality to everyone.

      December 9, 2011 at 2:44 pm |
    • George

      Wow, I made a post directed at Christians and the atheists are out en masse trying to lead people astray and trying to tear down Christians.

      December 9, 2011 at 2:46 pm |
    • Rick

      even if it was just the religious authorities that you were speaking of, what business is it of yours?

      December 9, 2011 at 4:14 pm |
    • George

      @rick

      Sin is everybody's business. Overlooking sin is how moral decay begins. If you saw a murder, would you not report it to the proper authorities?

      December 9, 2011 at 4:24 pm |
    • George

      @rick

      I'm going to pre-empt your response. To God, right and wrong are black and white concepts. Either something is right and good or it is wrong and evil.

      December 9, 2011 at 4:26 pm |
    • Bruce McGlory

      I like how y'all make things up as you go and call it god's word. it must be so handy to have an imaginary friend you can pretend says anything you want, hates who you hate, doesn't like what you don't like. That way, you don't have to take personal responsbility for your bigotry, hypocrisy, or fear-mongering.

      December 9, 2011 at 4:46 pm |
    • Rick

      george: anyone who equates the morality of two consentual adults having relations to murder is ethically challenged, to say the least.

      You have no authority to speak for god, georgieboy

      December 9, 2011 at 5:26 pm |
    • George

      "anyone who equates the morality of two consentual adults having relations to murder is ethically challenged"

      If you are calling me ethically challanged, you are calling God ethically challenged because God condemned all of mankind to hell simply because Adam ate the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. No, it just shows how screwed up your morality is. You don't understand that to God sin is sin – all worthy of hell. It is man who makes gradations of what is worse. That works for man, but not for God.

      December 9, 2011 at 6:02 pm |
    • Sarah

      @george
      "God condemned all of mankind to hell simply because Adam ate the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. "

      Seems to me condemning ALL men to hell because one man ATE A FRUIT is down right messed up. It's revengeful, bitter, unforgiving, unloving, and not merciful at all. Wait. Aren't these the exact things Christian's AREN'T supposed to be?

      That right there is why I will never be suckered into your religion. Your "god" doesn't even live up to the standards HE made up. Christianity was founded on hypocrisy. Why should the topic of this article be any different.

      December 9, 2011 at 11:09 pm |
    • George

      @Sarah

      Different standards apply to man than to God. God can do or be whomever he wants. He is God after all.

      December 9, 2011 at 11:35 pm |
    • Sarah

      Cop out. A person of good character holds him or herself to a higher standard, or at least the same standard. What happened to leading by example?

      December 10, 2011 at 10:20 am |
    • Sarah

      Or maybe that means your god IS ethically challenged because I seem to understand morality better than him.

      December 10, 2011 at 10:41 am |
    • Rick

      Sorry, Georgie Boy, god did no such thing. Man did, and and you attribute their words to god.

      December 10, 2011 at 1:23 pm |
    • Rick

      Sarah: Georgie Boy is an argry p-r-i-c-k, so he finds comfort in an angry p-r-i-c-k god

      December 10, 2011 at 1:28 pm |
    • Rick

      "It's revengeful, bitter, unforgiving, unloving, and not merciful at all. Wait. Aren't these the exact things Christian's AREN'T supposed to be?"

      I have many friends who are Christian, and they are good people. Not all Christians are like that, as attested to by the blatherings of Georgie Boy

      December 10, 2011 at 1:30 pm |
    • Sarah

      @Rick,
      You are absolutely right, all Christians are not like that. I apologize if that is how it came across because it is by no means what I meant. I have Christian friends as well. But, they aren't my friends because they are Christian, they are my friends because they are good people. As witnessed here with George, they are not always one and the same.

      December 10, 2011 at 5:41 pm |
    • Mirosal

      George writes "Remember s.e.x outside of the God-given bonds of matrimony between a man and a woman is ugly, sinful, and of the devil." He couldn't be further from the truth. Marriage is NOT 'god-given'. That's a popular fallacy among the thumpers. Marriage was practiced LONG LONG before your little book was even dreamt of, let alone written. And it was practiced in societies that had NEVER heard of your 'god'. Marriage is the legal binding of a couple. Period. You do NOT need ANY religion to get married. It is a civil commitment. Remember, you need a CIVIL marriage license even if you do choose to get married in a church. Without one, even the church cannot perform your wedding. What do you think of that, Georgie-girl? (anyone else remember that song? lol)

      December 11, 2011 at 5:26 am |
    • Rebecca

      A longstanding member of many Christian congregations... I say that Christian men are behaving just the same as any other man. They are just hypocritical liars. If one in one thousand of them waits, I'd be surprised. The married men hit on the single women in church constantly. This is all b.s.

      December 12, 2011 at 9:41 am |
  14. Waited

    All the craziness aside here, I waited, my husband who is 30 waited, and we are happily married now. Most people aren't waiting because they don't think it is important or don't care. If they do care, they just don't exhibit enough self control.

    I don't know how waiting until marriage turned into such a crazy political debate/ religious bashing session, but people- show a little respect for diversity!? I decided to wait, if you think that is silly then don't. But respect other people, even when they have ridiculous points of view you can still be courteous.

    December 8, 2011 at 9:51 pm |
    • Rick

      I got no problem with people waiting. I do have a problem with F nuts like Georgie claiming that the Christians are the only people who are moral

      December 9, 2011 at 4:41 am |
    • nonbeliever

      @Waited-

      I don't have a problem with people who choose to wait, not at all. What I have a problem with is the people who tell me I am going to he.ll or that my life is somehow less important because my wife and I did not. While I have many issues with christianity and organized religion all together, I am tired of the lack of acceptance for people who do not follow the christian way. You don't have to agree with it or even condone it, but you have no right to tell me I am any less of a human or important because I don't follow the dogmatic views of a religion that I have found to be false.

      December 9, 2011 at 7:32 am |
    • Will Duffield

      Waited, You should have been pregnant at 25. Remember, abstinence works only about 99.99% of the time (the virgin Mary).

      December 9, 2011 at 12:40 pm |
    • faye

      You don't have a problem with George, you have a problem with God, because it is the Bible that says fornicators and adulters will not inherit His kingdom... It's a choice you'll have to make in life between the spirit and the flesh...God is a God of sacrafice..He sacraficed His life for us and we sacrafice the sins of the flesh to honor Him. What's so hard about understanding that or disagreeing with it? Let us that understand God, have God. He spoke about those that would mock us and about those that would not be able to understand what we believe( the spiritually blind). Statistics show that if you live together before marriage, it's a higher chance of divorce...God's word controls the universe and there isn't anything you can do the change that.

      December 9, 2011 at 12:54 pm |
    • Steve

      @nonbeliever,

      Fine, then I as a non-Christian, non-religious man won't judge you. But your behavior is beyond unacceptable, disgusting and even fathomable and makes me wonder whether or not humanity are a bunch of animals that can't think for themselves and very likely have never had an independent thought of their own, except for the <1% of us who have waited and stood up for our beliefs (which is something very easy to do but your kind make it appear to be astonishingly difficult).

      Animals have impulses, human beings have thoughts; I'm not seeing that in 2011.

      December 9, 2011 at 6:37 pm |
    • Steve

      err..I meant 'm not seeing the distinction between the two in 2011 (last line).

      December 9, 2011 at 6:39 pm |
    • nonbeliever

      @Steve-

      "But your behavior is beyond unacceptable, disgusting and even fathomable and makes me wonder whether or not humanity are a bunch of animals that can't think for themselves and very likely have never had an independent thought of their own"

      I think you meant to use acceptable, instead of 'un.' With that being said, because I used the biology that was born into me, my human instinct to have se.xu.al relations, I am no better than an animal? That is of course laughable. Whether you choose to wait till you are married or not is completely moot in your argument. You choose (or chose) to wait, that is your decision. I chose to use what was given to me, in a completely educated and safe manor, before marriage. Nothing is different in how we use our se.xu.ality, other than you repress yours till a later date. All humans use se.x for means of pleasure and procreation. I'm not claiming to have an 'original' thought by not waiting. I am simply defending my lifestyle, which for the majority of America and probably the world, is the norm.

      December 10, 2011 at 3:39 pm |
    • Rebecca

      Maybe you waited. 1000 to 1 your husband did NOT wait. This is the biggest hypocrisy in the Christian church. Christian men have a double standard and are more than willing to lie to women about their own activities.

      December 12, 2011 at 9:43 am |
  15. PudninTane

    No. Just you. By the way, you don't speak for Evangelical Christians, either. You can only ever speak for yourself.

    I don't know why politics is being brought into this, but I will say one thing. I probably lean a bit more right, but I have no huge beefs with Obama. I'm not a huge fan, either. But I will say he is going to KILL the Republicans in the next election – because the Republicans are trotting out the same old douch.ebags.

    December 8, 2011 at 12:08 pm |
    • PudninTane

      Blast! This was supposed to be in response to the other comment!

      December 8, 2011 at 12:18 pm |
    • George

      All I can say is that time will tell. Conservative Christians are fed up with the direction that the country is headed.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:13 pm |
    • rick

      George: Lots of people are fed up with the direction this country is taken. I am fed up that the people running for president have to cowtow to blowhards such as you

      December 8, 2011 at 1:29 pm |
    • Qualia

      I agree, I'm fed up with the religious majority trying to force me to adhere to the tenants of their religion through legislation.

      You have no right to make some one else do any action purely on religious grounds.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:40 pm |
    • George

      @Qualia

      I have a right to vote, and I will vote for someone who will pull America out of the moral sewer that it is in at the moment.

      December 9, 2011 at 5:21 pm |
  16. Ramondo Robinson

    As a Christian I realize that the Bible doesn't belong in government or society as a whole. Becoming a Christian is a choice and I hate it when other Christians judge others and society when they fall short, when they themselves and in most cases are just as worldly as those they accuse. So I apologize to those that don't believe who have to put up with the simple minded people who judge them while standing in their own filth(no one is perfect so yes these guys have no room to judge). In America they are Muslims, Jews, Buddhist, Atheist..etc everybody has their own view on God and until the end...no one will know so we all just keep our Faiths. I just think WE have bigger problems (Like the economy...job growth) than to sit here in a blog and bicker about who is screwing who and why. "To Each his own" because that is what it means to be free.jussayin

    December 8, 2011 at 11:24 am |
    • p4ul47

      -nice. You are a tolerant decent person unlike others.

      December 10, 2011 at 9:00 am |
    • phil

      Wow, nice and balanced post.

      December 11, 2011 at 9:45 am |
  17. Rachel

    I am so excited this article was written! My fiance and I are getting married while still in college and I am only 19, due in part to this reason. The longer you wait, the harder it is to stay pure. 1 Corinthians 7:9 states, "But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion." Early on in our relationship my fiance and I prayed for God to show us when to get married, we opened up the Bible to read and landed on this verse. Many people judge us for admitting that we are marrying in college to avoid sinning against God, but it is the truth! It is better to marry than to burn with lust.

    December 8, 2011 at 11:19 am |
    • Doc Vestibule

      Of the total number of divorces in the U.S., 64% are couples who married before the age of 24.

      December 8, 2011 at 11:28 am |
    • MarkinFL

      One thing that is definitely worse than having se.x outside of marriage is getting married too soon for the sake of se.x.

      December 8, 2011 at 11:32 am |
    • rick

      Good luck, Rachel.

      December 8, 2011 at 12:40 pm |
    • George

      Good for you, Rachel. Don't let the naysayers sway you from faith. I wish you luck and a long happy life together.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:06 pm |
    • MarkinFL

      Personally, I wish you luck as well. Just please examine closely your motivation to get married now and make sure it has NOTHING to do with se.x. Hormones are poor match-makers. If they are involved in this decision you may regret it one day. I truly hope not.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:10 pm |
    • PudninTane

      Oh, just come out and say it people! Do NOT get married! You're 19 and still in college. This basically means you have NO IDEA who you are yet. Don't worry about that, pretty much no 19 year old does; you'll figure it out. But there is NO WAY you can claim to know someone else well enough to marry them if you're still figuring yourself out – which you are. Wait until after college, live your life a bit, maybe travel some, THEN see what you think.

      If you do get married, best of luck to you. But I'll paraphrase Chris Rock here: People say life is short. No, it's not. Life is long – especially when you make bad decisions.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:59 pm |
    • PudninTane

      And while I'm at it, if you're both ready and you're careful and respectful of each other, just have se.x already! Stop worrying about the religious guilt and judgement of those in your religious community – 99% of whom had se.x before they were married. Sheesh! With all the rediculous religious violence, corruption, greed, and hate in the world, don't you think God has better things to worry about than whether two consenting, in-love, not-taking-advantage-of-one-another, responsible, adult college students have se.x or not?

      December 8, 2011 at 2:17 pm |
  18. Steve

    I'm pretty thoroughly convinced that if there is a Hell, and I believe there is, then Christians ought to be the very first ones there.

    And I doubt it's 80%. Although it might be among certain sects, so I'm skeptical.

    Probably more like 99%.

    But they're all good little Christians come Sunday morning. Probably even consider themselves quality human beings for having 'only' slept with 25 men (or whatever the media currently tells them is okay to).

    F-ilth.

    December 8, 2011 at 4:06 am |
    • Steve

      PS. (I'm also convinced no b-rothel is as dirty as your typical Christian church).

      It's like these morons are purposely trying to do everything in their power to get themselves persecuted so a handful of them still left, and not as afraid to stand for their beliefs, can make themselves look like 'martyrs for Jesus' when they get thrown to the lions...again.

      December 8, 2011 at 4:08 am |
    • PudninTane

      No, the first ones will clearly be the Jews. Filthy Jews!

      December 8, 2011 at 3:30 pm |
    • PudninTane

      By the way, how come I can write something clearly rediculous and insulting like "filthy Jews" with no problem, but I have to put a stupid dot in se.x? Stupid CNN.

      December 8, 2011 at 4:27 pm |
    • Steve

      "I'm pretty thoroughly convinced that if there is a Hell, and I believe there is, then Christians ought to be the very first ones there." That is wrong

      December 10, 2011 at 8:08 pm |
  19. Daniel

    1 Corinthians 79 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

    Bible answered this problem a long time ago. Modern Christian's just don't seem to listen.

    December 7, 2011 at 7:54 pm |
    • George

      Amen, Daniel. You speak truth.

      December 7, 2011 at 8:42 pm |
    • nonbeliever

      Unfortunately for christians, biblical law is not societal law, and never will be. It is not illegal to have premarital se.x and it is not immoral either. Despite what georgieboy wants the world to think. Bible cannot be used to dictate truth because it is not considered a factual, historical reference, it is a religious book. There is a major difference.

      December 8, 2011 at 7:40 am |
    • George

      "It is not illegal to have premarital se.x"

      This is not true. It is forn.ication. There are laws against it in some states although they are rarely enforced. We need to elect politicians who are not afraid to start enforcing those laws.

      December 8, 2011 at 10:34 am |
    • nonbeliever

      @George-

      And this is where I have lost all respect for you and your argument.

      It's illegal in some states to carry a bible and talk to people about your jesus, I think we should hire politicians to bring that law current.

      Give me a freaking break.

      December 8, 2011 at 10:46 am |
    • George

      @nonbeliever

      Show me where you have EVER had respect for my argument.

      December 8, 2011 at 10:56 am |
    • MarkinFL

      Burning with passion was a great way to pass the time before we got married!

      December 8, 2011 at 11:05 am |
    • Doc Vestibule

      If only The Man would enforce all the se.x laws!
      In Washington, DC, it is technically illegal to use any position other than missionary – so I guess the entire population needs to go to jail.
      The Alabama State Troopers need to start doing a house to house search for s.ex toys, as owning one is illegal out there.

      Or maybe law enforcement should just butt out of the bedrooms of consenting adults...

      December 8, 2011 at 11:20 am |
    • rick

      If politicians pressure police to enforce the laws against fornication, they will rightfully be voted out of office

      December 8, 2011 at 12:44 pm |
    • Get Real

      Daniel
      "1 Corinthians" - Ol' Paul of Tarsus again, eh? Seriously, you wouldn't buy a used car from that guy if you met him today. He was a ranting, raving, misogynistic, misanthropic zealot, who was a skillful promoter of the new cult that he latched onto.

      December 8, 2011 at 12:48 pm |
    • HotAirAce

      rick, what do you think would happen to those same politicians if they proposed that anti-fornication laws (or all laws about what consenting adults might do in the privacy of their own living spaces) be repealed?

      December 8, 2011 at 12:49 pm |
    • rick

      Hot Air: I think they would be elected

      December 8, 2011 at 12:50 pm |
    • nonbeliever

      @George-

      I've taken the time to respond to you intellectually and articulately, that shows my respect.

      When you spout out statistics and ideas that have NO factual backing, when you dodge all my questions, over and over again, and when you spout out the most ignorant knowledge, you deserve to lose it.

      You sir are obtuse, and not worth my time.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:21 pm |
    • Qualia

      "1 Corinthians 79"

      Fun fact, if you rip any single verse of the bible out of context, you can literally support any position ever.

      For instance, God likes feeding children to She-Bears (2 Kings 2:24)

      Yaaaay quote mining.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:27 pm |
    • MarkinFL

      Are you implying that feeding children to she bears is in some way wrong? Just asking?

      December 8, 2011 at 1:34 pm |
    • HotAirAce

      rick, I also would like to think they would get elected, but I think it is much more likely that the christian right would put up a huge fuss. We (well the USA for the most part 'cause Canada has already eliminated most of these sorts of "blue-nose" laws) will likely remain in the strange situation where we have religion based laws on the books that go unenforced but can't be removed, driving both sides crazy.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:34 pm |
    • Qualia

      @MarkinFL
      Depends on if they were making fun of a prophet's bald head.

      If they were, it is totally moral.

      If they weren't, then there's no biblical precedent for it, and we shouldn't feed children to she bears.

      December 8, 2011 at 1:46 pm |
    • Rick

      Hot Air: I think it would depend on how far Americans as a whole have the bible shoved up their rectums. If most American Christians are like Danny Boy, they those politicians would be defeated. I doubt that is the case.

      December 8, 2011 at 4:53 pm |
    • Steve

      They're called blue laws, George. And they're basically meaningless. (wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_law)

      December 9, 2011 at 11:31 am |
    • Bruce McGlory

      George, get some help before you hurt someone.

      December 9, 2011 at 4:47 pm |
  20. Sarah

    To anyone claiming the rising divorce rate = proof of moral decay...
    The reason the divorce rate was what it was before the 70's is because men were free to abuse their wives and have all the affairs they wanted without any repercussions at all. Women didn't divorce their husbands because they were so afraid of losing everything they had, including their children. Times have changed and women don't have to put up with the same crap they used to from men. The divorce rate may have been lower in the past, but that is no indication that marriages were any healthier.

    December 7, 2011 at 6:16 pm |
    • George

      "because men were free to abuse their wives and have all the affairs they wanted without any repercussions at all"

      I read that far and no farther. Abuse and adultery were always grounds for divorce. You have been brainwashed by liberals.

      December 7, 2011 at 8:41 pm |
    • Justin

      George, it is simple fact that more marriages were less than healthy before "blameless" divorce was allowed. You have been brainwashed by Fox News.

      December 7, 2011 at 9:10 pm |
    • George

      No-fault divorce is one of the key reasons our country is in the moral sewer today.

      December 7, 2011 at 9:45 pm |
    • Simon Blackson

      George, the key reason that America is in your so-called moral sewer is people who use their problems to enhance the pain of others. Not divorce. More than abuse. Longer lasting than the abusers, because the cycle continues. And the world again goes around.

      December 7, 2011 at 10:51 pm |
    • George

      @Simon

      Do you even understand Christian morality? Or are you one of those "it's moral if it doesn't hurt anyone" atheists?

      December 8, 2011 at 1:10 am |
    • Rick

      Georgie Boy: I am one of those "it's moral if it doesn't hurt anyone" athiests. I recognize a bigot, as do other people on this forum, christian or not. you are a blowhard and a bigot. real christians would be ashamed to have such a anal leakage as you identifying with the same god as they. go sodomize yourself, pendejo

      December 8, 2011 at 6:01 am |
    • nonbeliever

      @georgieboy-

      You don't want to listen to Sarah's argument, but you blast yours as truth? It is on the same basis of correlation as yours is. I can link the incline of divorce to the levels of global warming if you wanted me to. It's a ridiculous, unfactual based argument.

      I've asked you a million times over, but you refuse to acknowledge me: SHOW ME YOUR EVIDENCE THAT THE MORAL DECLINE IN THIS COUNTRY IS LINKED TO DIVORCE?

      Maybe it will take a few capitalized words for you figure it out.

      And what makes this so funny, is you are giving christians a bad name in your ignorant comments. Educate yourself sir, please. This is why christianity is declining, their followers know nothing about their religion as they drag it through the mud.

      December 8, 2011 at 7:54 am |
    • MarkinFL

      George, before the 70's even rapists were rarely convicted. Domestic abuse has a long and terrible history and judges rarely stepped in. Even now women are killed by estranged husbands because judges refuse to believe that the nice charming man standing in from of them could not possibly be a cruel violent bas.tard. "Thank god" for the ability to divorce and the ability for women to be independent.
      My morals are better than the average Christian's in my opinion. And I use my opinion and that of my friends and family, not some nasty old book written centuries ago by a bunch of misogynist, autocratic sheepherders.

      December 8, 2011 at 9:55 am |
    • PudninTane

      I know I'm wasting my time again and only encouraging him, but what the hell.

      George, it's YOU who does not understand Christianity and morality. You really misunderstand the Bible and pretty much every single teaching of Christ.

      The ideology you're spouting is NOT Christian. The ideology you spout is hate and bigotry. And, to top it off, you're a troll.

      December 8, 2011 at 9:58 am |
    • George

      " SHOW ME YOUR EVIDENCE THAT THE MORAL DECLINE IN THIS COUNTRY IS LINKED TO DIVORCE?"

      Linked to divorce? I'm telling you that the high divorce rate is not linked to moral decay but is in fact part of the moral decay. (Jesus preached against divorce and especially divorce and remarriage.)

      December 8, 2011 at 10:41 am |
    • George

      @Rick

      LMAO. I'm a bigot because I believe in traditional Christian morality? My advice to you would be to get your heart right with God if you cannot see the difference between bigotry and morality.

      December 8, 2011 at 10:44 am |
    • MarkinFL

      Jesus preferred that people stay in abusive relationships and work through their differences and depression, broken bones, concussions and funerals. Nothing like being miserable on earth to make you pray for a beautiful eternity. So shut up and take your abuse like good sheep and you will be happy to die one day.

      December 8, 2011 at 10:47 am |
    • HotAirAce

      George, I assume then that you will not voting for Newt if/when he becomes the GOP presidential nominee and that you will be recommending the same to the christian conservatives you are recruiting?

      December 8, 2011 at 10:48 am |
    • MarkinFL

      Typical Christian morality is easily seen as bigotry to those that see the world in objective terms.

      December 8, 2011 at 10:48 am |
    • George

      @PudninTane

      I guess you think that all evangelical Christians are not Chiristians then too, huh? I guess you that that all conservative Christians are bigots and trolls then also, right? Just because we stand up for traditional morality, i.e. no s.e.x before marriage?

      Well, we shall see in the next election. A conservative will be elected, and no conservative can be elected without the conservative Christian vote. I will rejoice on that day when good triumphs over evil.

      December 8, 2011 at 10:51 am |
    • George

      I do not think that Newt will get the nomination. But if he does, I will vote for him as the lesser of two evils.

      December 8, 2011 at 10:53 am |
    • MarkinFL

      George, you'll vote for Newt why? Because money is more important than morality?

      December 8, 2011 at 11:01 am |
    • Yo!

      "I do not think that Newt will get the nomination. But if he does, I will vote for him as the lesser of two evils."

      Newt has been married three times, cheated on his 2nd wife and was brought up on corruption charges, you're an idiot if you vote for him.

      December 8, 2011 at 11:09 am |
    • HotAirAce

      George, wouldn't that be practicing moral relativism? I thought all morals were absolute. Wouldn't the honourable thing to do be to point out Newt's flagrant disregard for his (and yours) cult's rules and encourage others not to vote fro him? I'm not sure you are an idiot (I leave room for mentall illness...), but you certainly are inconsistent and likely a hypocrite.

      December 8, 2011 at 12:16 pm |
    • rick

      No, Georgie Boy, you identified yourself as a bigot when you claimed that only Christians can be moral.

      December 8, 2011 at 12:46 pm |
    • rick

      George: I see a clear distinction between morality and bigotry. What I don't see is a difference between your bloviating and bigotry

      December 8, 2011 at 12:52 pm |
    • Sarah

      @George
      "Abuse and adultery were always grounds for divorce. You have been brainwashed by liberals."

      If you had continued reading my post, you would have read that I said women were afraid to divorce their husbands out of fear of losing everything, including their children. Just because it was grounds for divorce didn't mean the woman would come out of it with anything more than the clothes on her back. Even if the man did cheat or abuse, the children could go to him if he wanted without an issue. I have kids and if I were to imagine myself in the position to either feel the need to stay in an abusive relationship or lose my kids, I would chose my kids every time. Thankfully, I live in an era where I don't have to make that choice. Is that moral decay? I think it's quite the opposite.

      December 9, 2011 at 12:59 pm |
    • LinCA

      @George

      You said, "LMAO. I'm a bigot because I believe in traditional Christian morality?"
      No, you are not a bigot for what you believe. You are a bigot for trying to force that nonsense on the rest of society.

      December 10, 2011 at 4:10 am |
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The CNN Belief Blog covers the faith angles of the day's biggest stories, from breaking news to politics to entertainment, fostering a global conversation about the role of religion and belief in readers' lives. It's edited by CNN's Daniel Burke with contributions from Eric Marrapodi and CNN's worldwide news gathering team.