By John Blake, CNN
(CNN) –True love doesn’t wait after all.
That’s the implication in the upcoming October issue of an evangelical magazine that claims that young, unmarried Christians are having premarital sex almost as much as their non-Christian peers.
The article in Relevant magazine, entitled “(Almost) Everyone’s Doing It,” cited several studies examining the sexual activity of single Christians. One of the biggest surprises was a December 2009 study, conducted by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, which included information on sexual activity.
While the study’s primary report did not explore religion, some additional analysis focusing on sexual activity and religious identification yielded this result: 80 percent of unmarried evangelical young adults (18 to 29) said that they have had sex - slightly less than 88 percent of unmarried adults, according to the teen pregnancy prevention organization.
The article highlights what challenges abstinence movements face. Movements such as “True Love Waits,” encourage teens to wear purity rings, sign virginity pledges and pledge chastity during public ceremonies.
Yet many of these Christian youths eventually abandon their purity pledges, Relevant’s Tyler Charles concludes in the article. Tyler talked to people like “Maria,” an evangelical woman who said she wanted to wait until marriage to have sex.
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But she said she started having sex with her college boyfriend when she turned 20 because nearly everyone, even most of her Christian friends, were having sex.
It seemed everyone in my life, older and younger, had “done it.” In fact, I waited longer than most people I knew and longer than both of my sisters, even though we were all Christians and came from a good home.
Relevant theorizes about why it’s so hard for so many young Christians to wait, including the saturation of sex in popular culture, the prevalence of pornography and a popular “do what feels good philosophy.”
Yet the article also asks a question that rarely comes up in discussions about abstinence movement. Relevant notes that in biblical times, people married earlier. The average age for marriage has been increasing in the U.S for the last 40 years.
Today, it’s not unusual to meet a Christian who is single at 30 - or 40 or 50, for that matter. So what do you tell them? Keep waiting?
Scot McKnight, author of “The Jesus Creed,” and "One.Faith: Jesus Calls, We Follow," acknowledges that young, single Christians face temptations that their counterparts in the biblical age didn’t face.
He tells Relevant:
Sociologically speaking, the one big difference – and it’s monstrous – between the biblical teaching and our culture is the arranged marriages of very young people. If you get married when you’re 13, you don’t have 15 years of temptation.
So what should a Christian parent or youth pastor do? How do they convince more young Christians to wait until marriage, or should they stop even trying?
the FALLING AWAY has begun, where christians choose to excercise their human rights and follow sin rather than scripture. The bible is an optional extra, faith is a lovely feelly thing, and worship is a good old singalong to jesus and god and whatever.
Marriage is 'try before you buy', god will bless you with money...lots and lots and lots of moneyyyyy. and anyone who really worships God is obviously paranoid delusional. Just remember to get your 666 at the door on your way to hell so called 'once saved always saved', unless you weren't really saved, just a religious pretender.
God exist nd it is only a fool that will wake up every morning saying God does not exist.
how did u think u came into existence,oh evolution........i laugh your ignorance,think twice before saying that God does not exist just because you haven't seen him or wait,i guess ur brain is not real because i am not seeing it eighter..
Have YOU actually seen this 'god'? In person, face to face? Oh, and you cannot use your buy-bull as ANY kind of "evidence".
stephen: you are a pompous jerkov
stephen ... we are supposed to be reflecting God's love so that people can see Him... peopel are on this site commenting and what not..obviously they are searching for answers.. so show the Christ's love... dont insult them. we are equal sinners in God's eyes! :)
i wake up every morning with no forecast to see the sun rise....truly a religious experience….and that’s a cross the bored I’m sure you Christians agree. So why the fu-ck are you thanking the tyrant god and not the sun,… I really don’t care what you call her Helios, Ra, sol, or that big ball of burning gas but at least show some grat-itude
First of all, God is not a tyrant. Second, we don't thank the sun and thank God because God created the sun. Would you thank your Toyota for its existence or thank the engineers who designed and built it?
You are full of S H ! T. All religion are terrorist group. You are a group of people insane, going around brainwash other people. PROVE IT DAMN IT
Please learn basic spelling and grammar before attempting to insult peoples intelligence. Attempting to call people stupid when you can't put together 3 coherent sentences is like the pot calling the kettle black. Go back to school before it's too late.
Stephen, i't always nice to know someone enjoys standing for the true. The Fact is, everyone knows there is a God. That includes
the ones that say they don't. It's proven that even the Atheist , know's there is a God. I myself had to be reminded there is a
highier power. We as humans believe the in the things we can see. But as you know the things you see are temporary, the things you can not see are enternel. Everyday someone walks outside and feels that awesome wind blowing across there face. And they only notice the evidance of it, and don't ever stop to wonder where it comes from and why you can't see it.
Now this is for those Nimrods that don't believe or don't care. The wind you can't see, God you can't see and if you can, why do you doubt there is a supernatural that does exsist. Go ahead! lie to yourself. Keep telling youself you never felt that breeze that cools you when your hot. But if you do, you can rest assure there is a God. you unbelivers always seem to amaze me.
j.r. perez: do you presume to know the nature of this "higher power"?
j.r. perez: it has been "proven" that atheists know there is a god? where is this "proof"?
come on, j..r., are you going to answer the questions or are you going to make your statement and run like a coward?
the challenge of waiting for a ltime is a tough one but is worth it.. getting married earlier would help but the economic state does not make any easier for early marriages, on a personal term its being a war well, we are gonna keep fighting.. hope we win...
When I married (we were in our 30s) we were both virgins, although I had gone to 3rd base a couple times. I really regretted not having saved everything for my husband, even kissing. I realize now how important intimacy is, and I wasted it on guys who weren't worth it.
I think you confuse intimacy with exclusivity
Fluffer, I applaud both you and your husband. That is very admirable you waited till marriage. That's what I call true love. I only wish I could find a man who's a virgin, since I'm also one.
nasus: i suggest Strar Trek conventions
Physics and Faith? Check out http://www.PhysicsOfReality.com
Life is tough for everyone, we all have our ups and downs, but when we are down everyone then makes a choice. If God were not real, then the Bible would not be real. If that were true, then we would all just do whatever we felt like doing, but God is real. He is working miracles in the lives of so many, just look at the aid that went to Haiti. In Port-Au-Prince right after the earthquake, organizations from all over the world went to help the Haitians. In order to maintain order, the church organizations were called in to organize all the food and supplies. This is not because they were special, it is because God gave them the power and wisdom to achieve this. God is good and he loves everyone just the same. He can help us through all temptation and give us true joy. I am not perfect and I struggle daily, but God is perfect. The Bible is God's way of talking to us and is how we hear from God. God is good and He loves you!
You base the existence of god because the bible is real? The bible has soooo many "fact" in it that are now proven to be wrong, even to the extent that the church now admits it was based on the understanding of the people writing it at the time it was written (which kind of destroys the whole god wrote the bible story, he would have just got it right, right?) Anyway, something to consider, god did not make man, man made god....Just, think about that a bit more.
I would be guessing though, that I am talking to people who will never accept that god does not exists, so, I will just go back to saying that the Flying Spaghetti Monster is far superior to your god! PS, onus is on you to prove FSM does not exist ;)
Nate: So, god only talked to a few people in an currently extinct language 2,000 years ago? Why not now? He is god, no? Why not a big booming voice that will shake the windows? Why have us dig through iron age stories to know him? Why does he not present himself, up front to all?
Rick – Have you ever tried asking God to show himself to you? Doing it in all sincerity, not in a "OK monkey, dance!" type of way? (not saying you've done that) I don't know why he doesn't just call out with a booming voice from the sky for everyone to hear at 2pm every Thursday (well I've got some ideas...), but I do know for sure that he does clearly show himself unmistakeably real to whoever is open to hear it... I say this from experience and seeing the experiences of others.... No hallucinogenic substances =)
Kyley: Sorry about the lack of hallucinogenic substances. Times are tough. In terms of the calling out, how do you differentiate between internal dialogue and an extenal deity?
Where was God after Katrina? Our God loving Pres. Bush was able to block his love.
"If God were not real, then the Bible would not be real." That is the crux of your argument. It is so easily countered by: If Harry Potter were not real, then the series by JK Rowling would not be real. If Spiderman were not real, the movies about him would not be real. If Allah were not real, the Quran would not be real. And if you disagree with any of those statements I just put forth, your argument holds no water based on your own logic.
Rick – I think there's a few ways, but one of the main ways to tell is results. Whoever is really hearing from god will have things happening and changing in their life that is distinctly different and cannot be otherwise explained.
For me, at first, I didn't hear anything, but something changed inside of me. i.e. when I was a teenager, I'd lie down in bed at night and for no explainable reason I would always have an eerie, freaked out feeling like "something" was there in the dark. One day, one of my friends dragged me to church with them and I saw that people there had something intangible that I didn't have... and I wanted it. So I asked god if he would show me in all sincerity. Later that night, I went to bed and after laying there with the lights off... and noticed that I no longer had any fear or eerie feelings. I wasn't even thinking about it, until I realized it was gone... And I haven't been ever since... I also had a lot of internal changes that were pretty much instantaneous... A lot of my att-itudes changed for the better... not all of 'em obviously... I'm human... But enough to know that something totally different was happening and that the God that I was reaching out to was doing something beyond my control.
My dialog usually starts off with me admitting that god is god, I am not god, and that being the fact, he perhaps knows how to do things better than I do. So I ask him to show me. I get "impressions" that I believe are from him, and it is confirmed that they are, because they result in changes in my life that no oprah winfrey book would have produced. I've also prayed about some major life decisions, really earnestly, telling absolutely no one, and had total strangers approach me in church, telling me exactly what I prayed about, and what God was saying about it.
Adrian: You stated that the Bible has been proven wrong and different facts in it are false. Show me something that is false. Show me something that has been proven wrong. There is no falsehood in the Bible, not contradictions, nothing. Many may try and prove the Bible to be false, but none can without lying. God is there and is all of our lives for a purpose. We can either reject or accept God. He is there and He made everyone. It is not the other way around.
Also, the Bible is real and therefore God is real. Harry Potter is not real, and therefore its books are fiction. I know God is real because he works in the lives of many everyday. He wants to work in everyone's life forever. Look at Tim Tebow, He is a passionate follower of Christ and he gives God the glory. Also, how about prayer in government meetings. He is there and these officials have to believe it, otherwise we would never pray. Our pledge is also a good example of this. In America, we are "under God," because our forefathers knew the power of God and we need to too. The way to do this is to read Hid word. I challenge all of us, lets read our Bibles "more and more." If we do, we will see that God is indeed real and alive in our world today!
Kyley: Thanks for the explanation. I can see that you are sincere in your beliefs. Peace be to you.
Nate: At some point in the past, the best basketball player was Muslim (Kareem Abdul-Jabbar), at some point in the past, the best boxer was Muslim (Muhammed Ali), did their exploits give glory to Allah? If so, is Allah real? If not, why does Tebow's success give glory to Jesus?
Rick: I can see you are sincere in looking for what is true vs what is not, and your b.s.-o-meter is well calibrated. You raise good questions, and when you see someone who says they are christian, but the rest of them doesn't match up, you don't as-sume all christians are like that person, which is admirable. God has a pretty low tolerance for pretense too – I think you two would get along. :)
Men wrote the Bible, not God.
This Christian is still waiting and will continue to wait until the time that I am joined in the eyes of God with my future wife. Nothing short of that is acceptable in his eyes, and thus, mine. No matter how much or how loudly my basal urges roars, I am not given to the needs of the flesh but by my own will, I rise above them.
How can we call ourselves adults if we can not control ourselves?
Jonathan, what a great role model you are to other hypocrite Christians. I admire you for your beliefs and your self control. I wish more men were like you, for not many people nowadays have morals. To men out there with STD's and especially with children out of wedlock, you could learn a thing or two from this very smart guy.
You've drank far too much of the koolaid! To think that waiting is possible for everyone and is a sin otherwise is just purely closed minded stupidity!!! That is not the reality of the world and you can't expect people to wait. Hormones are not always as controllable as you would be mislead to believe and I do believe this article is about young people, not adults. Young people act out in various ways in this world and this is one of them...nothing wrong with it at all and it has been proven that abstinence pledges don't work. The USA has the highest rate of teenage pregnancy of any country due to the influx of christards preaching the wrongs of something natural to every species. Recognizing that s/ex is natural and educating is the only proper way to prevent unwanted pregnancy and std's...preaching from a book of fables is not going to resolve the issue and until that books becomes part of the system of teaching about anything (outside of mythology to the ones fearing the only life they have), that book should not be held accountable as part of teaching anything.
Sorry you are missing out and will be the 60 year old virgin...you have no idea what you are wasting you life on...you poor poor delusional child.
The problem with our churches today is that they don't preach enough on sin. We need to bring back the old hellfire and brimstone sermons of yore. S.e.x is for marriage and procreation only. Any other use is an abuse of the body. We are called to put aside our sinful flesh if we are to enter into the Kingdom of God.
"The problem with our churches today is that they don't preach enough on sin. We need to bring back the old hellfire and brimstone sermons of yore."
Because fewer and fewer people accept it.
"S.e.x is for marriage and procreation only. Any other use is an abuse of the body."
Wow, Mrs. George must have loved that.
"We are called to put aside our sinful flesh if we are to enter into the Kingdom of God."
You can have the kingdom, I will take the flesh
Priests only started preaching sin and hellfire because it put people in the pews. And people in the pews meant more money in the coffers.
THERE IS NO GOD, THERE IS NO GOD. There, now that I have stated it thusly, you must believe me. Right??
Saying something over and over and over again, stating that it is the TRUTH with a capital T, does not make is so.
Believe, or do not believe, but leave me the hell alone. I do not believe in the Easter bunny or leprechauns either.
I know in my heart, soul, essence, whatever.. That there cannot be a god as stated by so many people.
All knowing, all powerful. NOT a chance.
But I love the holiday season; I am so glad the pagans started it so many years ago. Without them we would have no December holiday, no light up trees, etc. etc.
So... Thank you Pagan peoples.
What proof do you have of no god, how can you back up your belief?
Brad: Unless someone is claiming it as a fact, there is no need to back up a belief. Same goes for theists.
and I say those things in the name of humanity, Amen! Your;re so right mate! No more proselytism, that's the wish I have for the new year.
hello friend, quite a firm theory of yours! But tell you what, there is a God creator of the universe, and man kind to whom one day every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that he is LORD. Lets reason a bit, we see a painting, right away we know there is a painter, if we look at a building, a structure we know there is a constructor or builder. when you look around when you look at your love ones, especially when life seems the best,don't you think there is someone behind all of this other than just a BIG BANG? May the Lord Bless you, and may you enjoy the season
Mister. do u believe the whole world knows your father?? yet, should that mean u don't have one or u were not born?? your father is real, i believe, so, much as u could have never seen a sign that GOD is real, doesn't mean what you think of him is ultimate truth. you just need more information and exposure. GOD lives and the second u seek him is the second you will clearly see him.
TO SEEK HIM, JUST KNEEL DOWN AND AFTER 10seconds OF SILENCE, SAY; JESUS I NEED U IN MY LIFE FROM THIS MOMENT. you will be good to go.
"hello friend, quite a firm theory of yours! But tell you what, there is a God creator of the universe, and man kind to whom one day every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that he is LORD."
The existince of one does not imply the existence of the other. A creator does not mean a judge of human interaction
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Typical, yet another case of man's attempt to mend God to adapt to their desires.
Since man invented god I'm not sure why this would be an issue
Serus: How many Christian denominations are there? Seems to me that they are at the forefront of mending god to adapt to their desires
Christianity has been morphing god to be what they want him to be for generations, angry god vs. a loving god, god grants free will vs. god has predestined who will enter heaven, god wants us to pray to saints vs. god wants you to pray to him alone. It's all about what the people want god and their religion to look like. But that is of course what happens when man creates religion.
Yes... and how about the newest, trendy, pop-religiopsychology one - they have a "personal relationship" with 'him'?!
Elwood: But, only if it is the "right" him
That was the one thing I never truly understood, the entire time I followed christianity. How in the world do you have a 'personal' relationship with something that never personally interacts with you? Religion, and christianity specifically, is such an emotionally run religion. Everyone wants to have an 'experience' with their god, they want to fall on their knees and cry as they worship their god. Christianity has done such a marvelous thing, linking music with their worship. Music is one of the most powerful tools (if not the most powerful) to evoke an emotional reaction. Churches play happy and upbeat music to get people excited and then bring them down after an emotional message of how it's by the grace of god they aren't burning in he.ll, and then play moving praise music to bring tears to their eyes. It's kinda scary how well churches have down this emotional control over their members.
When I was a follower, I would hit a 'high,' that I always equated to being incredibly close to god and then eventually I would peak and couldn't have that feeling any more. I would think there was something wrong with me, that I wasn't doing it right. I always equated that feeling to being close to god. It wasn't until I really understood what was happening, that I was able to gain control over my own life. If there is a god, he doesn't desire a relationship with us, why would he? It makes no sense. But without that relationship, that purpose in your life, most people would fall away and the religion would eventually die.
Yes, I remember the thrills and chills when thinking that I was communing with the divine. It is quite seductive and addictive. I finally realized that they were self-induced emotional responses and that I was talking to myself.
I have asked these "personal relationship" folks over and over about what "God" or Jesus tells them. Is it anything that they have not already learned or heard before, or anything that they couldn't dream up or figure out using their imaginations? They never respond. Sometimes I feel sort of like an ogre, throwing a wet blanket on their fantasies, but when they want to control others with them, those fantasies have gone too far.
i am waiting...for anal
Christianity as a solid idea set is defenitely a thing of the past
While I wish this were true, everything goes in waves. Every time a natural disaster hits or something terrible happens (i.e. 9/11, war, economy crashing) church attendee's go way up. A lot of people don't want to confront their problems, they would rather a god do it for them.
There is a story told of how a college co-ed student was being heckled by her peers for not wanting to have s.e.x. But one day she silenced them all. When a groupof girls were heckling her she replied, “I've got something none of you can ever have.” One belligerent girl shot back, “Oh yeah, and what would that be? She calmly answered, “My virginity.”
WOW......what a combeback.
and the other girls shot back, "we've been given something that nobody else has given you ... an orgasm"
Oooooh, I guess she told them! NOT! Idiot.
1. While the the girl in question is a virgin, the other girls
1. While the girl in question is a virgin, the other girls WERE virgins at one time as well. 2. Aren't you a little old to be spelling the "bad" words? If it's a "bad" word, use a different word or words. Otherwise, just don't use said "bad" word or words.
That is extremely far-fetched...and I have trouble understanding why the girl allowed the conversation to take place at all. It's an entirely private matter.
Yes I am sure she silenced them all. Probably due to the fact the girls had to shut down their brains and restart them due to the stupidity of her retort. I have heard that retort before and it just sounds so god damn stupid you don't know how to respond at first. Though I do agree with Sam's response probably being the best after they comprehended that someone actually tried to use that as a defense.
I googled this story hoping it would pop up as some story for youth pastors to tell their students, unfortunately, I believe Bo made it up. I'm going to pretend, until other wise told so, that this was meant as a joke. Because I got a really good chuckle out of it.
I know, right? They sure talk a good game.
I totally agree. Hypocrites indeed. Can't stand the temptation.
Yeah, they're sure hypocrites a million times over. They should just convert to Atheism, so they won't have to worry about sinning over and over.
I think the body's overall intuition is to do what's easiest. So therefore, if the human mind finds it easier to grasp that a “God” doesn’t exist, then so thinketh that person. But if you have the capacity to realize that an entire universe or multi-verse cannot be conquered by the human mind, then it’s at that point creation goes from being scientific to being “spiritual”; and that’s just creation, not everything that happens within the boundaries of existence. I didn’t mean to get philosophical, but that’s what “worldly mind” is rooted in. By the way I myself have fallen into this sin, but have realized that it was truly God’s grace that brought me out of it.
You are introducing the "god of the gaps," that is, you are appealing to god to fill in for unknown information.
It wasn't sin. It could have been a good memory and an enjoyable experience, if you hadn't gone all revisionist on your personal history. And no, it isn't easier to not believe in a god. If you believe, it's a comfort, whether or not it's real. For those of us who see the reality of the situation, sometimes, things look grim. But it is what it is, and it's better to live a real life than to self-medicate with myths.
Two of the 20th century’s greatest scientific discoveries—the universe’s beginning (Big Bang) and delicately-balanced cosmic constants—actually invite God to fill the explanatory gap.
Many naturalists complaining about the God-of-the-gaps are guilty of an opposite and equal reaction—a naturalism-of-the-gaps! They assume: “One day (naturalistic) science will give us the answer to our questions.” Ironically, many naturalists tell believers who find evidences for God’s existence in nature, “Science is always changing; we have to be careful about drawing positive theological conclusions from it.” But their naturalism-of-the-gaps implies so great a confidence in scientism that ultimately no evidence for God can ever emerge.
"So thinketh the person"? Do you speak like this?
Let me rephrase: while it's easier to believe in whatever you want to believe in, in order to obtain the best out of life you must be willing to humble yourself before someone's principles and guidelines. Otherwise you'll go through life thinking "only what I know, have seen and heard, are what's best for me." How do truly expect the best for you and your family by only relying on yourself?
I don't remember if I posted before but it's called self-discipline and willpower. Well add to that, pressure from the society to sleep and live together before getting married. At the same time it's okay to have babies out of wedlock and mothers going to SSI for help. So much for "happiness" and "true love" huh...
How hyperbolic of you. I had many lovers and never got a disease, never even had a pregnancy scare. You might call it self-control, but sometimes, from this side, it seems like shame and repression. It was a great time of my life, and I wouldn't trade it for all the fire and brimstone satisfaction in the world.
As Billy Joel says, "I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints. The sinners are much more fun."
There are other ways of expressing self discipline and willpower. If you don't assign any importance to virginity, then waiting is not what you will be doing.
I love Billy Joel.
Yeah, you can say that again. It seems like everything that was un-moralistic back in the 1950's is the norm nowadays. Today, you're an outcast or punished if you have morals.
nasus: looking to the 1950's a high time in american morality?
umm because before a some dumb book full of rules and regulations you didn't have to?
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