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October 20th, 2010
09:20 AM ET
Pope creates two dozen new cardinalsPope Benedict XVI announced Wednesday that he would create 24 new cardinals - putting his stamp on the body that will select his replacement when he dies. The 24 senior Catholic clergy who will be getting their red hats next month include two from the United States, plus men from Egypt, Brazil, Poland, Italy, Zambia, Ecuador, Sri Lanka and Germany, among others. Many of the incoming cardinals are already based in the Vatican as senior officials of Roman Catholic Church bodies. With the new influx, Benedict will have created 62 cardinals since becoming pope in 2005. It's the third time he has created new cardinals. Known as "princes of the church," cardinals are the highest level of the hierarchy below the pope - and when a pope dies, cardinals under the age of 80 vote on his replacement.
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Marriage made in Heaven
On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple was involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they began to wonder could they possibly get married in Heaven.
When St. Peter arrived, they asked him. St. Peter said, "I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out," and he left.
The couple sat and waited for an answer for a couple of months. While they waited, they discussed the pros and cons. If they were allowed to get married in Heaven, should they get married, what with the eternal aspect of
it all? "What if it doesn't work? Are we stuck in Heaven together forever?"
Another month passed. St. Peter finally returned, looking somewhat bedraggled. "Yes," he informed the couple, "You can get married in Heaven."
"Great!" said the couple. "But we were just wondering, what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?"
St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slammed his clipboard on the ground.
"What's wrong?" asked the frightened couple.
"OH COME ON!" St. Peter shouted. "It took me 3 months to find a priest up here! Do you have any idea how long it'll take to find a lawyer?"
St. Peter sure is incompetent.
Ø Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his
level and beat you with experience.
Ø War does not determine who is right – only who is left.
Ø The early bird might get the worm, but the second
mouse gets the cheese.
Ø Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the
fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
Ø Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
Those that live by quotes, hide behind others words.
Lock up your pre-teens!
Oh, these are the new holy wafers, they have icing on them.
SHUT UP AND EAT THEM.
Church = The Big Lie My Church is My Heart, My heart bid is my Prayers I do not need any one to Preach for me, I do not need a Book, Their is only One GOD
@solsytem
Only one? Are you sure? What if you were wrong? How would you feel?
"Their is only One GOD"
And who does this being belong to? Are they like a doggy on a leash? Who is 'they'?
I'm sorry, I had to. Lol.
Did the Pope just commit a "Cardinal Sin"?lol
May God bless them and guide them.
@Frank
Now, when you make posts like that, how the hell can I point somethin' out or make fun of it...?
Frank-- You gotta' give me something I can disagree with... You know, something to work with here.!!! 🙂
Yes, Frank, thank you for praying…it was like a breath of fresh air and brought me to my senses.
@CatholicMom
Now I am feeling some of that good ole' 'Catholic guilt' right now from my post.. 🙂
Hope that you are well...?
Peace2all,
Aren’t you feeling well tonight….you forgot to end with your usual prayer….
Peace2All:
I'm sorry. Lol
CatholicMom:
You're welcome. Was it like smelling salts? Lol.
Peace2All:
You want something to make fun of me for? Here, I'll post a Lady Gaga song. This song is my anthem. 😛 (I'm bored and this place is pretty dead right now so...)
"Silicone. Saline. Poison – inject me, baby. I'm a free b!tch. I'm a free b!tch.
Some girls won't dance to the beat of the track. She won't walk away, but she won't look back.
She looks good but her boyfriend says she's a mess, she's a mess, she's a mess now the girl is stressed. She's a mess, she's a mess, she's a mess. She's a mess.
(Tell 'em, girls.)
Baby loves to dance in the dark. 'Cause when he's looking, she falls apart. Baby loves to dance, loves to dance in the dark.
(Tell 'em, girls.)
Run, run. Her kiss is a vampire grin. The moon lights her way while she's howling at him.
She looks good but her boyfriend says she's a tramp, she's a tramp, she's a vamp but she still does her dance. She's a tramp, she's a vamp but she still kills the dance.
(Tell 'em, girls.)
Baby loves to dance in the dark. 'Cause when he's looking, she falls apart. Baby loves to dance, loves to dance in the dark.
In the dark...She loves to dance in the dark. In the dark. She loves, she loves to dance in the dark.
Marilyn. Judy. Sylvia. (Tell 'em how you feel, girls!)
Work your BlondeBenet Ramsey, we'll haunt like Liberace. Find your freedom in the music. Find your Jesus, find your Kubrick. You will never fall apart. Diana, you're still in our hearts. Never let you fall apart. Together we'll dance in the dark.
Baby loves to dance in the dark. 'Cause when he's looking, she falls apart.
Baby loves to dance, loves to dance in the dark.
In the dark..."
I think this is keeping on topic since Gaga is Catholic and she name drops JC in the song. I could also post the lyrics to Madonna's Like A Prayer. 😛
@Frank
Don't you mean "like a virgin"? ??
So, what time zone are you in?
No, honey. Like A Prayer. You know, it goes: "When you call my name, it's like a little prayer. I'm down on my knees – I want to take you there. In in the midnight hour, I can feel your power. Just like a prayer – you know I'll take you there." That's my Madonna jam. 😛 (Now I have to listen to it.) Like A Virgin works as well, though. Ave Maria. Lol.
Eastern Standard.
@Frank
Ha! I forgot about that one. I was never much of a fan. Didn't need to be when there were so many others willing to take my place.
West Coast, here. Watching people disappear at odd times makes me think most of them are on the East Coast.
I'm not a huge fan of her, either. I think she stopped being great after the Immaculate Collection and then she was okay with Ray of Light, and now she's just a stuck up b!tch and a has-been who wants to pretend that she's English. I prefer Cyndi Lauper.
Hey, I'm from San Francisco originally. 😀
I'm a nightbird and I have insomnia. I also have a spliting headache right now. I feel like Zeus birthing Athena.
@Frank
Sorry to hear that. Go get some rest. Get your game on for next time. Peace2All is sure to have better arguments later....
ttfn
Oh, I will eventually. I'll be alright.
He's going to argue against my Lady Gaga posting?! :O
@Frank
You didn't run off? I'm glad.
I have no idea what he'll do about your wild assertions without merit – lol
No, I like Lady GaGa, she's a bit out there, but her songs sound okay to me when I catch them on the radio.
Those are weird lyrics, tho. But try writing a song and you'll see just how hard it can be...
On topic, why do you think it's two dozen cardinals and not some other number?
Nah, I'm hyper. I'll sleep whenever I take some Tylenol PM. Lol.
Yeah, it looks odd typed out, but if you hear the song it makes sense. It's called Dance In The Dark. It's my favorite from her.
I like to write but I'm not good at writing lyrics or poetry. Not something to be suggested to me!
I actually have no idea why they chose that number. I don't much about the College of Cardinals besides the basics – that they are the second highest hierarchy in the Church, the Pope is selected from them, etc. Oh, and they have pretty vestments.
@Frank
Well, I can't quite wrap my brain around "pretty" in this case, but that's okay. heh. They might get a kick out of your opinion...or excommunicate you, I'm not sure which...
You don't think cardinal red is a pretty color? Ah, well.
Oh, I'm sure I'm excommunicated for a variety of other things. Oopsies.
I'll let God worry about that when the time comes. That's how I look at it. Haha.
@Frank
I try to tell people that if God is the way they say he is, then no one should have any worries at all. But since the description inevitably fall afoul of all logic and reason, that tends to be the fly in the ointment, the monkey in the wrench, but no one reads that far when I explain in a gigantic post. I have become the wind-bag extraordinaire. A raison in the sun, the logic of which they fear to tread.
8D
Yeah, I tend to only read the first 2 sentences of each post and then everything else is a blur to me as I scroll down. Lol.
Actually, I'm illiterate. My computer is reading this all to me.
@Frank
Illiterate, eh? Well, that explains a good many things about your weak arguments...lol
Nope. Not going to goad me into fighting. One love and all. Feeling the peacefulness. 🙂
Catholic Mom, if someone praying is a breath of fresh air to you, you really need to have your head examined.
I guess it would be too much to hope that these new cardinals were created to hunt down pedophile priests and bring them to justice, wouldn't it?
@NL
Perfect...!
Abracadabra! OOps! The pope could and didn't? Did he have on his tin foil hat!
This is indeed a great miracle, the pope created 2 DOZEN new cardinals out of thin air! God forbid what would the church do without his holiness.
One former Catholic priest recalled an occasion when a lady parishioner asked him how long her late husband would be in Purgatory. The priest added he didn't know. The lady asked him if the Pope would know, for he had power over Heaven, Earth, and Hell when he wore his Triple Tiara.
The priest thought about it, and realised for the first time in his life, the absolute folly of this man-made doctrine. If the Pope could release tormented souls, which the Church said he could do, why didn't he? He left the priesthood soon after this and went on to become a Born Again Christian
"He left the priesthood soon after this and went on to become a Born Again Christian"
... simply trading one form of magical thinking for another...
-[Socrates] Any one who has common sense will remember that the bewilderments of the eyes are of two kinds, and arise from two causes, either from coming out of the light or from going into the light, which is true of the mind's eye, quite as much as of the bodily eye; and he who remembers this when he sees any one whose vision is perplexed and weak, will not be too ready to laugh; he will first ask whether that soul of man has come out of the brighter light, and is unable to see because unaccustomed to the dark, or having turned from darkness to the day is dazzled by excess of light. And he will count the one happy in his condition and state of being, and he will pity the other; or, if he have a mind to laugh at the soul which comes from below into the light, there will be more reason in this than in the laugh which greets him who returns from above out of the light into the cave.
So "A Story" Which is it?
From turning on the flashlight and laughing at those that thinks others can't see them.
Yes behold because that was such a profound response to the question... you sure put me in my place.
Glad to be of service, any more questions just let me know.
If that priest in your made up story knew anything about doctrine, he would've told the woman that it is not possible to know how long someone is in Purgatory or whether he was there in the first place unless some sort of sign is given. He would've told the lady to pray for the repose of her husband's soul.
Bad example!
Christians sure know a lot... about made up stories.
Great News! The Bars of the gates are strengthened!
Perhaps you've heard the saying, "Rearranging the deck chairs on the T-itanic...".
EXP+10, level UP!
Yes, I guess you were wrong.....
Thanks be to God!
Yes, because promoting more cardinals is truly indicitive of church growth. I guess we can disregard all the statistics about the priesthood crisis affecting the church or how donations are getting lighter because people are leaving.
So... Pope creates more Cardinals= Catholic stuff will continue...?
Yikes... Catholic Mom, I had hoped that we were done with the RCC at sometime soon...yes..?
I guess I was wrong.
Peace, when the gates of hell prevail you will be done with it. Oh wait Jesus said that will never happen. Sorry. But I suppose those like you will continue to try to prevail.
@geraldh
What the F * * K...?
He's just saying that hell will never prevail against the Church.
@Frank
Yes... and.... Me thinks he is also inferring Hmmmmm.. something about "those like me, will continue to try and prevail".. I think I was just insulted by one of your 'fundie' Klan....
Oh well.... 🙂
@Peace2All
geraldh has put himself forth as one who judges as God and condemns you out of hand in much the same way. That he feels no horror at what he does is indicative of his failure to understand what he is attempting to do to a fellow human being.
He is quite damned by his own rules, and if there is a hell (which would make a mockery of free-will and predestination at the same time), then he is "choosing" to put himself there.
If Jesus exists and is going to judge everyone, geraldh blasphemes by sitting in Jesus' place. It is a chair no one should want to sit in, if they believed in such things....yet we see it so often here. The fundies are nuts.
"Hell" makes no sense whatsoever, and beliefs about "Heaven" also fall under the axe of logic in this way.....!
And no one mentions the "marks of the Anti-Christ" upon their foreheads in the picture????? Truly these deluded people have been stolen from their rightful minds by the nonsense of the wicked.
😀 There! I have proclaimed unto them. May they find freedom from lies and delusion, but I do not expect it so.
Don't let 'em get to you, my friend. They are deluded and stretched out of their natural shape. 😛
I didn't realize I was a part of the Klu Klux Klan? Wow, the Klan must be hurting for members if they're allowing half black bis#xual transmen into their ranks. Lol.
Funnily enough, I've seen some Klansmembers who look Latino.
I see I went overboard again in my previous post. Sorry if it freaked anyone out. I used a mountain to crush a fly.
You'd think I'd know better by now, but it is hard to catch these things sometimes.
@Frank
Hi, sorry I can't argue with you right now, as I seem to be using heavy blows where they are not needed. No need to get out your baseball bat....! I am going... lol 😀
Lol. Don't worry, Raison. You haven't given me a reason to bring out my sadistic side. I'm far too masochistic. 😉
I think I just gave away too much information...
@Frank
LOL
You're half "black"? Which half? Left, right, top, bottom? Or does it make a sort of plaid design all over your body? LOL
I'm polkadot. 😀
@Frank
LOL
And what do you buy? lol
@Peace2All
Your schedule is considerably at odds with mine this week. So what's your excuse, mister? Eh? Busy making two dozen cardinals of your own?
Concussion from beating head against wall? Super-agnostic fever? Did Frank finally wear you out with his pinpoint accuracy?lol
Get right with the Laird, sinner! The last days are a-comin' and you've got nowhere else to turn! 😛
Well, I certainly didn't buy anything for s#x... 0:)
@Frank
Ah, ignore my lame joke. I like your polka-dottiness. Not many people can say that sort of thing, you know what I mean?
Ancestry is just a bunch of DNA making everyone crazy anyway. I'm part "black", but making an issue out of it seems insane.
I've also got a lot of other ethnic groups in the mix, so I don't like identifying with people who are so blinded by these things...but I suppose you've noticed I have strong opinions, eh? 😛
I agree. I'm actually about 8 different ethnicities. I just say I'm mixed. I'm just human. No one is one thing, anyway. I'm just...me.
Strong opinions? Please, I know you're really a quiet retiring wallflower. So ladylike. 🙂
This is, if you are a lady because I don't think I caught your gender. Haha.
@Frank
lmao! That's just the sort of dig I like to give Peace2All. He's a wild extremist, you know. lol
Nah, I be a straight dude. You would have picked up on the gender thing if you had read all my posts.
"caught your gender", no I guess you had it attached? lol Sorry, couldn't resist. Haven't had much opportunity to joke about transpotatoes. lol Even with all the "it's a trap!" jokes on the net, original material is rare. (oh, did I just say that?lol)
I've insulted plenty of women in my time, being old as well...ah...I just can't win can I? You stand on both sides of so many jokes that I have to ignore the whole thing. (did I just say that?) lol
Oh, this is too much! LOL
You're a hetero dude? Oh, noes! Usually I'm so good at figuring out a person's gender from their posting style. Okay, notthatgoodbutwhater. *whistles*
I know that Peace2All is just beyond all boundaries. He's part of the army of hell pounding on the Church's doors, after all. Well, according to one poster.
Yes! Gender is catching! I've actually caught about 4 or 5 of them here. (I actually hate those 'trap' jokes. If anything, most men are a trap. BUT I DIGRESS.)
What? Are you having a sugar rush?!
I actually am transpotato, though. I just hope nobody is in the mood for potato wedges. Ouch.
@Frank
Oh, no! You di-int! (I can do that sideways head thing when I say that, btw)
LOL
wedges, lol, that's a good one! Kate's better at these puns than I am. Wayyy better, except some of her puns are so obscure that I can only shake my head. Too bad she's busy workin'. But she might do a bombing run and show us all just how ridiculously serious we can be in here. She's done it before.
If the weather here wasn't so bad, I'd be doing bombing runs myself, but I've been too serious lately. Your jokes help. thx. 🙂
Oh, the pigeon head move? Lol. Are you a 9 year old black girl with barrets in her hair?
Kate will just jump in and call me a 'dictator', berate me for threatening Const!tutional freedoms and threaten me with her right to bear arms. Frightening.
Hey, there's nothing wrong with having a laugh. Happy to oblige. 🙂
@Frank
She's a Marine, or used to be, I forget which...so her use of firearms as a "friendly reminder" is just one of those things...she wasn't really threatening you, you know, just trying to suppress any leanings towards civil war over these issues, which the extreme right seems pretty bent on.
Just helpin', as she would say...
America is something we like to fight for when we understand what it means to have freedoms taken away...I could argue her points, but that should go in the other thread...
So to stay on topic...
Damn the Pope! He's a bugger of an ex-Nazi Youth member, stonewalling against children who have been abused!
There. That's on-topic. What do you think about them apples?
Well, I don't believe in war and I don't believe in gun violence. It just seemed like a veiled threat to me. If it wasn't, okay. I'm not really interested in that discussion, really. I don't like politics. It doesn't get anyone anywhere, unless you're a lying politician. This world is going to hell in a handbasket, anyway. 🙂
I like the Pope. I wonder what his favorite brand of German beer is. 😀
(You're not going to goad me into fighting! I'm feeling peaceful and no, I haven't smoked anything. Well, besides cigs.)
ZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZZZ...I think I'm going to catch some Zzz's now. Good night, Raison. Thanks for the laughs. Later, man.
@Frank
Damn! Oh, well, I hate politics, too, when all's said and done. Hate politics so much I refused to talk about them for many years when I was younger.
You like the Pope? Ugh! You don't get any points for taste, I'll tell you that much. Or sense, or any of a half-dozen things...but you are a transpotato, so how could anyone expect you to fit into some stereotype anyway? Or a coffee can?
As for cigarettes, I enjoy smoking and intend to continue until I die. You should try the other kind, which cancer patients need, but our freedoms are infringed, suppressed, and banned thanks to religious nuts similar to you (I have no idea where you stand on that issue, but nevermind) 😛
@Frank
Oops! Have a good one. 😛
The way I see it is that the Holy Father is the spiritual leader of over one billion people, plus he has to deal with all this all other stuff – anti-Catholicism, people's grievences, politics and the scandals and so on. That's not an easy job. I don't envy him at all. I know I would do much worse and probably buckle under the pressure.
As for drugs: I think all drugs should be legalized. The crap that doctors can throw at us can be just like heroin or coke, sometimes even worse when you're talking about psychiatric meds. The only reason that those drugs are illegal is because some of our 'leaders' have their snouts in the trough of the global drug trade. It's good PR to pretend that you're helping to fight the problem and present that face to the public, while you're making your drug money on the side. It's called having your cake and eating it, too.
I have no problem with weed. They've never found anything bad with it, anyway. In fact, they keep finding health benefits from it, especially in terms of fighting cancer. They're also finding health benefits from magic mushrooms. So go ahead and blaze, I say. Just make sure it's not cut with anything crazy!
I have got to get me one of those hats!
Oooooh, if only the Pope had picked you, David.....maybe next time.
@DJ
Dude... I have been SO wanting one of those hats for years...!
Sure the Vatican promotes the spread of AIDS, gave tacit approval to the holocaust and promotes ritualistic cannibalism – but can you think of another organization with hierarchichal haberdashery?
@CatholicMom Yeah, sadly he wouldn't have picked David because unfortuantely he hasn't covered up enough pedophile events or spoken out enough about condom use.
God bless you Megatron.
God made me exactly as he wanted. He created the universe with supreme knowledge. By my hand is his will.
Isn't that what your faith teaches? That anything touched by God is holy.
Therefore I am holy and my stating "The bible is clearly a work of simple minded sheep herders" is by God's will!
This will be on EWTN, I am certain. This is history in the making.
I am so impressed with our Pope…his humility,... his intelligence,... his wisdom…his holiness…his love of humanity….Thanks be to the Holy Spirit in keeping His promises.
CatholicMom,
B16 is intelligent? If so, why does he just say what he knows is true e.g. there never was a resurrrection of the simple preacher man named Jesus. Followed by: angels and satans do not exist and never did. And it would be good if he came clean about atonement theology.
The "skinny" of said theology:
"Moreover, an atonement theology that says God sacrifices his own son in place of humans who needed to be punished for their sins might make some Christians love Jesus, but it is an obscene picture of God. It is almost heavenly child abuse, and may infect our imagination at more earthly levels as well. I do not want to express my faith through a theology that pictures God demanding blood sacrifices in order to be reconciled to us."
"Traditionally, Christians have said, 'See how Christ's passion was foretold by the prophets." Actually, it was the other way around. The Hebrew prophets did not predict the events of Jesus' last week; rather, many of those Christian stories were created to fit the ancient prophecies in order to show that Jesus, despite his execution, was still and always held in the hands of God."
"In terms of divine consistency, I do not think that anyone, anywhere, at any time, including Jesus, brings dead people back to life." – JD Crossan
One question I have and I'm serious not just criticizing. You said "I do not want to express my faith through a theology that pictures God demanding blood sacrifices in order to be reconciled to us." Look at the things people have done in the past, like the holocaust. A quote that I think sums it up, terrifyingly I might add, is " They smell even worse when they burn don't they." -A Boy in the striped pajamas
If, according to your stated argument, you don't believe in God because of the "blood sacrifice" thing then how would you propose that crimes such as the holocaust didn't require such a sacrifice. Wouldn't justice need to be served? In some sense isn't that exactly what is was according to the bible (a work around mind you, but served nonetheless). How do you justify your argument?
@Reality
kjcube,
The common sense thinking about atonement theology was by Professor JD Crossan and can be found in his book (with Professor Watts), "Who is Jesus?".
@Reality
Thank you I'll take a look
I agree with you CatholicMom–B16 is a compassionate man who has a depth of love within him that I find to be quite inspirational. Crossan, I read about you on Wikipedia–it sounds as if you have no reason to have faith in Christianity any longer. As I'm sure you're aware, if there was no physical resurrection, then Catholicism and Christianity at large is completely bunk. I can't begin to understand what it would have been like to devote the first half of your life so devotedly to one pursuit only to reject it for the second half. It must have been painful, and it probably still is in some capacity. I only hope that you have found peace. I'll pray for you.
Why bother? Simply two more old white men posing as reincarnated apostles!! Get back to us when there are female and married representatives!!!
Red Hat? Hat Red? Hatred?
Get your self a Red Hat since you are filled with Hat Red= Hatred !
Well maybe those 24 RedHats are the ones that are supposed to be distributed in the Middle East Church preplaned extension? The third world ones will be debuted in the most dangerous religious zones of the MidEast?!
So that's the reason they wear red hats. Makes sense.