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 A series of recent conferences have cast a light on gay Catholics and their families.
November 8th, 2011
12:22 PM ET
My Take: Why good Catholics are challenging church line on homosexuality
By Patrick Hornbeck , Special to CNN The Roman Catholic Church has long been a reliable source for one-dimensional storylines: Victims of sexual abuse call for justice. Parishes close as numbers of clergy plummet. Rosary-clad Catholics protest outside abortion clinics. Perhaps nowhere has the storyline seemed more clear-cut than with regard to the church’s treatment of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) people and their relationships. Official Catholic teachings describe gay or lesbian orientation as “an objective disorder” and tell those who love their same-sex partners that they possess a “tendency… toward an intrinsic moral evil.” Catholic bishops have been public advocates for laws banning same-sex marriage, and some have sought to prevent LGBT Catholics and their allies from fully participating in the Church’s rituals and activities But neither formal teachings nor bishops’ statements tell the whole story. A series of recent conferences at American colleges reveals the breadth of Catholic approaches to issues of sexual diversity. The conferences, part of an effort called More than a Monologue, have happened at two Catholic universities and two non-denominational divinity schools The events conclusively show that American Catholics are hardly of one mind, nor in lockstep with their bishops, when it comes to same-sex marriage; to rights for LGBT people at home, at work, and in church; or to the ongoing campaign against anti-gay bullying in schools. At Fordham University in New York, a Catholic school, a proud mother of a grown gay son drew a standing ovation when she told a story about discovering the effect of church teachings on her child. Here’s that mother, Deb Word, who has founded a group Fortunate Families to help Catholic families with lesbian daughters and gay sons, in her own words: Fast forward to a family vacation in the Gulf. There were five of us floating—Sean and his wife, Chris, and his dad and me, holding onto each other’s rafts. And I said, ‘I think this is what Heaven is like.’ And Christopher said quietly, “except I won’t be there with you.” “Son, where do you get this stuff?” “Mom, it’s your club. You know the rules.” And if my cradle Catholic child, growing up in a loving family, got this message, then what does Catholic mean in more conservative homes? … And I wonder, why do I stay in a club that my son says is dangerous to his soul?” Another panelist at the event described the freedom she feels as a result of living, within the church’s rules, as a celibate lesbian. A third, a physician in New York City, praised the Catholic tradition for its emphasis on human dignity and social justice, but added: “I am troubled by the fact that I find greater acceptance of myself as a whole person in my professional community as a physician, than I do in the official hierarchy of the church of my family, my childhood, and my life.” At the same time, he refused to let the church off the hook for the part he accuses it of playing in tacitly condoning the bullying of LGBT youth. Last month, at Yale University, a Catholic layman who teaches psychiatry spoke movingly of his attempt to offer church leaders the wisdom of his scientific field, and of his bitter disappointment when his offers were met with silence. And at Connecticut ’s Fairfield University, scholars, clergy, and lay Catholics recently discussed the implications for the church of having many gay and lesbian people, both in and out of the closet, in roles as priests and ministers. These public events have brought into the light the struggles, compromises and choices about meaning and love that many Catholics experience daily. Poll numbers show that while many of their bishops have been stepping up their rhetoric on the issue, only one-in-three American Catholics describe opposition to same-sex marriage as “very important.” Seventy percent support legal recognition for same-sex couples. All of us, Catholic or not, LGBT or not, owe it to ourselves and our fellow citizens to keep these new conversations going. Let’s not to settle for only part of the story. The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Patrick Hornbeck. soundoff (2,880 Responses)« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 Next »
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The CNN Belief Blog covers the faith angles of the day's biggest stories, from breaking news to politics to entertainment, fostering a global conversation about the role of religion and belief in readers' lives. It's edited by CNN's Daniel Burke with contributions from Eric Marrapodi and CNN's worldwide news gathering team.  |
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Editor's Note: Patrick Hornbeck is an assistant professor and associate chair for undergraduate studies at Fordham University.
This is a disgusting photo........children may see it and think it is good and proper. What the hell is wrong with the mentality of CNN? Are they trying to spread disgust because they themselves are disgusting?
"This is a disgusting photo........children may see it and think it is good and proper"
Because it is good and normal.
Its good that children see it and think its good and proper you nitwit.
You're really funny. Sorry, it's not going anywhere. Get over yourself. This comment actually made my day. Children, this IS true!!! This is the real world, not a fantasy of 'perfection'. I seriously cannot stop laughing.
Burning the images of a fearful Hell into the children's minds is more psychologically damaging than teaching them tolerance and understanding of basic human rights that the US has so far been very much so lacking in. Some American dream, eh?
Children should see this.
Its perfectly normal.
I would rather see two men kissing than watch a movie full of violence
and blood.
oh my friken god these two guys are kissing ugh that makes me sick! being gay is AGAINST god!!!!!!!!! i bet many people agree with me.
God created gay people so the prejudice and bigotry that has filled his churches could be revealed. You know nothing about the true meaning of love.
I suppose we can look forward to you posting that over and over, since this is your second iteration. And, fyi, God doesn't like it when you use 'fricken' in front of His name. Tool.
Those who hate have no room to be happy. It's sad that all the promises given to you by the church aren't fulfilled. I'm sorry you have to fear hell and fear it for others because they're being who they were born and happy with their lives. It's a real pity you're indoctrinated into the hate and fear you deny you have when it's so obviously clear how strong it is.
Starr, you are a hater. Get over yourself and keep your bigoted comments to yourself. Just because you think something is against god, doesn't mean it is. Live and let live.
What gays do in their own bedroom is their own business, but get that photo out of my face!
Yes... pictures of 20 to 40 year-old beautiful females and good-looking males only, please!
Everybody here who uses the minor details of the bible to rail against gays better pay as much attention to the bible's other little details: I hope that they don't eat shellfish, wear more than one piece of clothing at a time, have tattoos, or work on the sabbath...Because the bible says they should die or be stoned in public for those offenses. Man, I guess NFL fans better start bringing bags of rocks to stadiums, cause those football players definitely break most of those rules of "Gods Law" all at once. Poor Tim Tebow.
The Biblical Person I've been following said something like this to the Pharasees: " If you have an ox that falls into a pit on the Sabbath, wouldn't you pull it out?" DownToEarth8, lots of religious progress has been made over the centuries with the help of JC.
So where is that religious progress in regards to gay people?
If people are gonna follow certain parts of the bible word for word then they should do so with the rest of the bible. And also, aren't people syaing that being gay is a sin? Well don't we have original sin and aren't we forgiven for our sins if we accept God? Why can people be forgiven for murder and not be forgiven for kissing a dude?
robertinatlanta...do what you wish but dont wave your beliefs in other peoples faces...if you want to be a gay...good...be gay and shut the f-up.
Bendover: Or else what?
No need for name calling
Sooo....let me get this straight...You're saying GAYS are the ones throwing their beliefs in other peoples faces?
I get it, you're Catholic, now please stop all Christmas, Easter, St. Patrick's Day celebrations. Are they really necessary? Do I care what your religion is? NO. Keep it to yourself.
If you are seven years old, shouldnt you be in school ??
Please lets focus on the Children that are getting abused by " Straigh" Men. Or how about the people who are starving in our country "USA" Raised a Catholic and choose to be a christin. LOL !
I love the picture – I'd rather be gay and have a wonderful relationship than be straight and be in a terrible abusive relationship. All you posting about this picture and this subject must be pretty abusive and be terrible partners!!
Sure, if those are the only choices.
It really shouldn't matter if they were two women, two men or a man and a woman. Religion is the opiate of the masses.
Differences are neither good nor bad – just different. The picture is wonderful – tender and expressive. Thank you for using it in the story.
All of these pseudo-Christian people need to stop judging others and put that energy into their own relationships with God. How you judge other people is how God will judge you. HE is the only judge – so get over yourselves!!
"HE" is a figment of your imagination. There is no invisible man in the sky, religion is a construct of man designed to control other people, and as long as it lasts, thats all it will accomplish. All hail the Great Hadron Collider!
did you really have to show this disgusting photo????
Did you really have to click on it?
"did you really have to show this disgusting photo????"
So you find love disgusting, that's pathetic.
You mean the writer's photo? Ok, so it looks a little like a middle school picture, but it's not THAT bad!
Perverse at best.
".... and they let their world fall after they forget about the children..."
I never understood how Catholics would tolerate this. Their spiritual overlords say that if they start picking and choosing the things to believe in the bible, then it all falls apart. This is absolutely true. One cannot be catholic, and just reject all the things they don't like.
If you don't think that being gay is morally and spiritually wrong, then guess what: you are not a catholic. period. You might as well say that you don't think Jesus is the son of god, because the same factual basis exists for both of these arguments.
Stop marginalizing yourself by trying to smash these two conflicting ideologies together. You have to chose to either be gay or be catholic, and since you obviously can't chose not to be gay then your options are limited. Sorry. But on a positive note, there are religions out there that won't treat you like dirt.
"You have to chose to either be gay or be catholic"
being gay is not a choice....being catholic unfortunately is...
*sarcasm* I never understood how Catholics could tolerate this.... If you don't think that wearing clothing made of two different kinds of cloth is morally and spiritually wrong, then guess what: you are not a Catholic. Period. You might as well say that it's okay to be gay, because the same bit of scripture negates both of these arguments.
Stop marginalizing yourself by trying to smash these two conflicting ideologies together. You have to chose to either wear cotton-poly blends or be Catholic, and since it's almost impossible to find single-fiber fabrics these days, your options are limited. Sorry.
But on a positive note, there are people out there who understand the difference between the Old and New Testaments....*/sarcasm*
So asdf, you don't pick and choose? Really? Then, let's see, that means that according to Leviticus and Deuteronomy you practice the death penalty for the following: eating shrimp, wearing cotton/synthetic blended clothing, children cursing at their parents, etc? Do you keep your women carefully segregated days after menstruation? Cause you know they are unclean and you can't go near. Oh, and you must have no problem selling your daughters as slaves, or keeping slaves yourself. Cause all that is sanctioned.
What's that? You DON'T believe in those things??? Why, dear heart, that means YOU are the one "picking and choosing." Choosing your own special bigotry and looking for an iron-age text to make it "right."
LOOK IT UP!
I respectfully disagree. I reserve the right to call myself a Christian if I believe in living my life in a Christ-like manner, but I don't believe the guy was the son of God. But that's my personal belief. It's what I label myself. There are others who would disagree with me, but they cannot change what I call myself. Even if you're excommunicated and you still believe you're fundamentally Catholic I think you're still Catholic. You should be able to explain why, but still. Gay folks who commit themselves to one another with vows are married, because their definition of the arrangement is the only one that counts. Definitions are changed by common use, not the wishes of those wish things were otherwise. Like it or not, and whether it makes sense or not to us, we cannot control others who pick and choose definitions and experiences to build who they are. We all do it. And really, anyone who is not doing that isn't thinking for themselves anyway. 🙂
claybigsby: I beg to differ, being catholic being a choice allowed me not to be a lemming!
you people are crazy! it's just two people kissing. if it were a man and a woman you wouldn't be all up in arms. who cares? do you kiss your father or brother, guys? YOU people are disgusting with your utter hatred of other people for no reason. it's bigotry disguised as religion. you can wrap up a piece of feces in a pretty box and a pretty bow, but it's still poop. and you can pretend that your bigotry is part of your religion, but its still bigotry.
Jason, you are so right. This is just two people kissing. I mean it could be an adult and a six year old kissing and people would still judge or a man and a cow and people would still judge or four women and a man and people would still judge. People get over it.
edit: it's just consenting adults kissing!
are you people really so thick that you can't differentiate between someone who can consent to be in a physical relationship and someone who cant?
yes Ike, don't you think you're being a bit hyperbolic?
Hi, you all get trolled way too easily.
Thank you.
The really sad thing is that most of the crazies on here posting about the pic probably aren't trolling.
Good article, even better pic. Forces all the bigots out there to confront their nasty little reactions.
Did you ever wonder that maybe gay people get grossed out having to deal with the obligatory deep throat kisses between stars and starlets in every Hollywood production? Well, got news for you, sometimes we do. Get used to it.
Lol. My sentiments exactly.
Stop going to straight movies then. I choose not to watch gay films because they gross me out.
They just keep throwing it in our face. I don't care what people do behind closed doors, but I am getting to the point that I have had enough of this in you face s**T.
nothing is being thrown in your face...you chose to click on the article...now live with that choice and STFU
"you" people stick your religous crap in all of our faces on a daily basis. Now sit down, and shut up! You need to figure out that you are quickly becoming obsolete in your thinking and just go away.
CNN, please don't post this picture on your home page. It is very inappropriate and offensive to many people.
Would it be less if it were a man and a woman? Hmmm I think not!
HAHA! It is SO funny that you are offended!
Feel free to go to Fox News.
CNN.
If the pic at the top of the article bothers you...then you're lame. Love is love and comes in many forms. Personally seeing two guys, or two girls kissing is not shocking or odd to me. More power to them!!!
You are insensitive and wrong.
In your view love is what Sandusky showed to the children of second mile
The Catholic church is full of hypocrites gay is bad but the priest have no problem messing with little boys.All a bunch of perverts just like Herman Cain
Yes...let's just dig the hole even deeper
Actually, the catechism DOES tell the whole story. The notion that the church is going to abandon the truth if enough people disagree with it is wrong. The church doesn't change. It will never change on this issue.
"The church doesn't change. It will never change on this issue."
That's why it changed its mind based on the science and now state that just being gay is not a sin. LMAO!
So how do you explain divorce ?
The church doesn't recognize divorce and it never will.