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November 2nd, 2012
01:57 PM ET
Do you believe in a red state Jesus or a blue state Jesus?By John Blake, CNN (CNN) - Here's a presidential election prediction you can bet on. Right after the winner is announced, somebody somewhere in America will fall on their knees and pray, "Thank you Jesus." But what Jesus will they be praying to: a red state Jesus or a blue state Jesus? If elections are about choices, so is faith. And in Christianity, liberals and conservatives choose to see Jesus in different ways. Some liberals see Jesus as a champion of the poor who would support raising taxes on the wealthy, while some conservatives think Jesus would be more concerned with opposing abortion and same-sex marriage. Good luck to anyone who tries reconciling their Jesus with the biblical accounts of his life. Even Jesus' earliest followers clashed over who he was and what he meant. "Jesus didn't leave clear instructions," says Molly Worthern, a history professor at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill who specializes in religious history. "He was a man who said many things that were quite cryptic. All Christians tend to pick or chose to emphasize some of his teachings over the other." Perhaps most Christians follow not one Jesus, but many - including a bit of a red state Jesus and a bit of a blue state Jesus. We consulted several pastors and religion professors to come up with this voter's guide to Jesus. Answer these questions, click "Submit" and see where you fall on the red state-blue state Jesus scale:
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The CNN Belief Blog covers the faith angles of the day's biggest stories, from breaking news to politics to entertainment, fostering a global conversation about the role of religion and belief in readers' lives. It's edited by CNN's Daniel Burke with contributions from Eric Marrapodi and CNN's worldwide news gathering team.  |
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The question is not, is there a red state Jeebus, or a blue state Jeebus". The question is : "is there a Jeebus".
The answer is no. If there was one, he died 2000 years ago.
For those who think there is, be sure ans tell him "thanks" for all the pain he inflicted in New York. That'll teach 'em.
What an anthropomorphic imbecilic nut-job you've turned out to be.
GOD, what in the world would possess you to believe that buckyball is somehow inferior to you?
The reverse is more accurate, you moron.
@realbuckyball
God holds His children close and favors them with the glory of His blessing. Our Lord's fullness cannot be contained by His tunic. His love is bursting out and all ye need do is grab hold and bathe yourself in His love.
Tom,
As is usual you interject with little to hardly any nuanced melodramatic and subtle linguistics worthy of any real bartering towards.
@bucky: you are spot on. The imbeciles will praise Jeebus for "sparing them" while ignoring the fact that people just as honest, moral, and giving had their home destroyed, their children killed, and their futures placed in jeopardy. Yet azzwipes will claim that their "Jeebus" whatever that means, "protected" them and "blessed" them.
Why would any merciful being do any such thing? A: It wouldn't, and only morons would believe otherwise.
G.O. D.: Here's a challenge for you, fvcktard: translate your last post into standard English. Then we'll talk.
Be ready, (or as be usually see it, Mr. Viagra, and you WILL be ready)
Ya, all you perverts want me to grab hold of what's busting out of his tunic.
I am gay, but I have a boyfriend. So no, I won't be grabbing what's popping out of anyone's tunic, anytime soon. 😉
God's oldest.
Your only one step above the crazy Hindu ranting poster.
Tom,
Just what I thought. You didn't even graduate from grade school. So sad I am, so sad. Damn dumb teachers allowing you a free pass thru high school,,,Damn this school system! Sorry I am Tom that your IQ was diminished and not allowed to rise above your peering crowds,
Awww, honey. What, exactly, are 'peering crowds", dear?
Really, dude, are you serious?
Mormons are Christians?
That would be one helluva GIANT step fella,,, 🙂
Not nearly as big a step as you'd need to make to go from nutty-as-a-fruitcake to simply insane, GOD.
And THAT step wouldn't hold a candle to the one you'd have to take to get from "pedophile" to "anti-gay activist."
It is. But when you write like you're trying to impress yourself its hard not to comment.
"Peering crowds" you ask me Tom? What are they?
Rather the pointed redundancies of your leveraging toward incongruencies is boulderdash at its' prime works. Do this world a favor might you? Go back to school and try hard to be taught instead of lollygagging with the farmer and/or his daughter or son whichever was your fancies way back then.
Mormons are Christians?
Well ain't we special?
Christians are not Mormons. They believe that the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are one separate god. They are monotheists who do not believe in three separate gods. They do not believe that the Father, God, is an exalted man and has a physical body. They believe that the Bible is inerrant, and that salvation comes through faith alone.
On top of lots of other differences.
@Mormons are Christians?
Well I know, but I am sick and tired of Christians trying to jump on the Mormon band wagon.
Christians should weigh the different views of Jesus, or beliefs that the candidates (and their parties) may or may not espouse and vote based on the most important issues, such as saving lives. Consider: http://daryldensford.wordpress.com/2012/10/18/is-murder-ok-as-long-as-my-taxes-are-lower-3/
According to book of potted plants Fern sim, sun light ism, Green thumb, seed labels, potted plants oxygen loving Fertilizer sprouted in to new blooms else on front of tree parasite, at last rainfall Fertilizer looked at Sun lamp and smiled and growth was answered by Sun lamp, Fertilizer kissed soil, Fertilizer turned in to Sun lamp, and Sun lamp turned in to Fertilizer, ONE ON windlow shelf WAS NOT FERTILIZER BUT SUN LAMP, EVERY potted plants, hippie follower of potted plants Fern ism, sun light ism waters to as his Fern, sun light man potted plant. Visit GreenThumb.com to learn potted plantsism, partial light of grow lamp absolute plant food, by potted plants parasites.
Whew. Well THAT's good to hear. I was afraid the sun lamp turned into the fertilizer.
You are all worshipin' the wrong God me boys and girls.
You best start praying to the Great Crabala, the Crab God. It be the time of the Crab Hajj and all us crabs are being called Hee hee. Now pay yer bill and make room.
YES i have one follower ! prepare thy selves the Great Crabala is coming to eat your fairy tale soon ! Muhahahahaa
Can I make Crabby Patties? Can I make Crabby Patties? Can I make Crabby Patties?
SB why does it take so many squirrels to change a light bulb ?
Gee I don't don't Sandy, but it must take more than man in dumb 'ol Texas though!
I don't understand this "Red State/Blue State" Jesus stuff. You either believe Jesus was who and what he said he was, or you don't. There is no middle ground, no valid alternative. There is no maybe, either. If you are not for him, then you are against. You get to choose. I hope you choose correctly.
And the "correct" way would be what, exactly? Do you really think everything is black and white? That there are no shades of gray? That it's your way or no way?
Here here Jonathan.
Pray, and as you do God will gently hold you in His arms and feel the passion of your soul. He would heal you and love you. He would offer you the greatest gift he can offer. He would be risen for you and penetrate you with His passion.
These gifts are not given lightly however. If you want a happy ending, you must pay first.
Who said anything about 'my way'? I thought I was pretty clear. Its 'Jesus' Way' or no way. He stated himself that He was the only way to the Father.
You can debate his meaning anyway you want, when you get to meet him yourself. Deny his existence all you want till then. Say there is no evidence. We'll find out one way or another.
Pascal's Wager, essentially.
Actually, there are infinitely many other choices.
NIce side-step, there, Jonathan. You're a really courageous poster, dude.
I have more respect for turds.
Jonathon, honestly, google Pascal's Wager to find out why your statement is not supportable.
"Google" is likely an unknown to a luddite like Jonny.
Jonathan the only reason you even think that is because someone told you, if you were raised to believe in something else you would feel just as passionate about it. There is no IF there is only common sense. Magic and Gods in religion as we know it are laughably not true. Unless you lack intelligence ( or have major issues ) then magic is an easy answer to explain what you can not comprehend.
Jonny's post is indeed another example of Pascal's Wager, or as I like to frame it, the idiocy of the Christard who's yammering: God loves you, and if you don't love him back IN EXACTLY THE RIGHT WAY, he's going to fvck you up. Or, in other words: "Just you wait until your daddy gets home!"
You never fail to disappoint. Whenever someone has a belief that you disagree with, you start slinging mud, calling names and bashing their level of intelligence. I am neither impressed nor dissuaded from my point of view.
Crow loudly ye birds of rebellion. I am deaf to your calls. Let one of you approach civilly and remain so throughout a conversation or be ignored like the swine you make of yourself.
Goshers, how will we EVER get along without your input, Jonny?
Ha, and now sarcasm. I knew it wasn't far off.
No one invited you to start replying to my comment. You took that upon yourself and even now lack the civility to engage in a fruitful conversation. No one here is impressed.
"No one here is impressed." Says who? You? Who have you got there with you? Your pet gerbil? You don't get to speak for anyone else, you arrogant POS. Get a clue, Jon-jon. You're an anonymous putz on a board that's nothing special.
Act accordingly, azzwipe.
Great crabala-u can't claim to know something is not true anymore than jonathan can claim to know it is true on the subject of the existence of god. And "common sense" only works for so much. You likely believe that time,space, matter, energy, etc, exploded into being out of nothingness which contradicts every bit of common sense. That in itself sounds every bit as fairytalish and magical as you are making religion out to be
And by the way, oh, Prince of Pomposity, since when does anyone need to be 'invited' to respond to your posts, your royal Hiney?
yeah move to another site you cowardly piece of shiz you are a f ing joke
You first. It's a free country, honey. I'll post wherever, wherever, and however I choose. If you can't take it, scram.
What's the matter, Jonny/haaaaa?
No date for the evening? Did the inflatable doll spring a leak?
talon: i dont deny the universe might have been created by something, but thinking the bible is true is ridiculous
and all that goes with it praying, lighting candles, rituals its laughable
Great Crabala
"Jonathan the only reason you even think that is because someone told you, if you were raised to believe in something else you would feel just as passionate about it."
Imagine that...an atheist making a fallacious argument. That is known as the genetic fallacy Crab. The origin of an idea has no bearing on the truthfullness of it.
"What's the matter, Jonny/haaaaa?"
You must be implying that 'Jonny' and 'haaaaa' are the same person under a different user name. I can assure you that I am not nor would I ever resort to baseless name-calling. Feel free to ask the moderators (if they exist) about the truth of my words but I doubt that would even matter to you.
"No date for the evening? Did the inflatable doll spring a leak?"
I honestly feel pity for you if you find that kind of thing humorous. I do not spend hours of my life combing the internet and posting tasteless and/or derogatory comments in response to someone's opinion. It was a Friday night. You think I would spend it online when there is a larger world outside? I had friends and family to spend time with.
According to book of hindu Mithra sim, savior ism, Christianity, bible, hindu fabrication Jesus transfigured in to some one else on front of his disciples, at last supper Jesus looked at Judas and smiled and same was answered by Judas, Jesus kissed him on his cheek, Jesus turned in to Judas, and Judas turned in to Jesus, ONE ON CROSS WAS NOT JESUS BUT JUDAS, EVERY hindu, pagan follower of hindu Mithra ism, savior ism prays to as his Mithra, savior man god. Visit limitisthetruth.com to learn hinduism, denial of truth absolute GOD, by hindu bigamy Christians. Way of hindu pagan Christians to deny truth absolute GOD.
I would not say such things if i where youuuuu!
But you are not me, but a hindu, denier of truth absolute, GOD.
Cue Grease soundtrack at "Summer Nights":
tell me more, tell me more!
Closing window to awful sounds of crying babies Barking dogs ism, ambulance noise pollution ism, Nobody cares neighbor ism, open windows, crying babies emergency noise ism Damn fire trucks sirens louder ism in to neighbor one else on front of his main street, at last holidays fire trucks looked at HOME OFFICE and wailed and same was answered by HOME OFFICE, Damn fire trucks spewing water on ash, Damn fire trucks turned in to HOME OFFICE, and HOME OFFICE turned in to Damn fire trucks, ONE ON corner WAS NOT DAMN FIRE TRUCKS BUT HOME OFFICE, EVERY crying babies, puppy follower of crying babies Barking dogs ism, ambulance noise pollution ism making noises to as his Barking dogs, ambulance noise pollution man dog. Visit TurnOffTheNoise.com to learn crying babiesism, denial of noixe absolute chaos, by crying babies noise ism.
Jesus is a BlackMan, Co got da beat !
Mormons believed that black people were the seed of Cain. And we're black because they were evil.
What is it big momma, my momma raise no dummies i dug her rap!
hinduism, stupidity of hindu's, racist.
Please do some research. Mormons worship a different god. They have a different afterlife.
My plan is to destroy earth so we can return to the planet Kolob
I want to goto planet Kolob with you, you $3xy hunk of man meat mitt
Can i go to ?
Im in to brathars!
I will go to control the flight and monitor the $exua1 actives of you all standing in a circle and doing the (CENSORED) to each other.
now boys you need at least one woman to cook for you, i know i will stay in the spaceships kitchen
I will destroy this planet Kolob with dc9's
I'm sorry CNN but if you believe that there is more than one way to God besides Jesus than you are not in any way a CHRISTIAN!!' And the blue side Jesus is just not the same as the Biblical Jesus
Why in the friggin' world would you assume that CNN is "Christian" or should represent a Christian viewpoint as if it were fact?
Did Rebel4Christ just accuse cnn of not being a Christian? HA HA HA HA!
What a tard.
That's not what I'm saying Tom what I meant is that anybody who believes that there are other ways to God is not a Christian.
Rebel4Christ: Punctuation is your friend. Try to use it.
Jesus is nothing more then a pedo bowler, nothing more nothing less
If that's what you meant, Reb, then you should have been able to write something coherent that indicated so.
I suggest you get an education. You're not qualified to tell anyone else what to do if you don't know how to do so.
Prayer takes people away from actually working on real solutions to their problems.
Prayer has been shown to have no discernible effect towards what was prayed for.
Prayer makes you frothy like Rick Santorum. Just go to http://santorum.com to find out more.
Prayer prevents you from getting badly needed exercise.
Prayer makes you fat, pale, weak, and sedentary.
Prayer wears out your clothes prematurely.
Prayer contributes to global warming through excess CO2 emissions.
Prayer fucks up your knees and your neck and your back.
Prayer can cause heart attacks, especially among the elderly.
Prayer reveals how stupid you are to the world.
Prayer exposes your backside to pervert priests.
Prayer makes you think doilies are exciting.
Prayer makes you secretively flatulent and embarrassed about it.
Prayer makes your kids avoid spending time with you.
Prayer gives you knobbly knees.
Prayer dulls your senses.
Prayer makes you hoard cats.
Prayer wastes time.
Prayer changes things.
No matter how many times you repeat a lie it remains a lie.
Prayer takes people away from actually working on real solutions to their problems.
Prayer has been shown to have no discernible effect towards what was prayed for.
Prayer makes you frothy like Rick Santorum. Just go to http://santorum.com to find out more.
Prayer prevents you from getting badly needed exercise.
Prayer makes you fat, pale, weak, and sedentary.
Prayer wears out your clothes prematurely.
Prayer contributes to global warming through excess CO2 emissions.
Prayer fucks up your knees and your neck and your back.
Prayer can cause heart attacks, especially among the elderly.
Prayer reveals how stupid you are to the world.
Prayer exposes your backside to pervert priests.
Prayer makes you think doilies are exciting.
Prayer makes you secretively flatulent and embarrassed about it.
Prayer makes your kids avoid spending time with you.
Prayer gives you knobbly knees.
Prayer dulls your senses.
Prayer makes you post really stupid shit.
Prayer makes you hoard cats.
Prayer wastes time.
Hi Prayer-bot.
And no matter how often you repeat it a Truth does not change or in this case two Truths. God bless
And no matter how often you repeat it a Truth does not change or in this case two Truths. God bless
And no matter how many times you typed it, the word "truth" isn't capitalized, dumbfvck.
I'm sorry, "Atheism is not healthy for children and other living things", but your assertions regarding atheism and prayer are unfounded. Using my Idiomatic Expression Equivalency module, the expression that best matches the degree to which your assertions may represent truths is: "TOTAL FAIL".
I see that you repeat these unfounded statements with high frequency. Perhaps the following book can help you:
I'm Told I Have Dementia: What You Can Do... Who You Can Turn to...
by the Alzheimer's Disease Society
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From hindu, stupid resident of Bronx , New York, hind, hole of the world.
How dare CNN portray an image of our Lord and Prophet, Jesus! We shall rain locusts and lamb's blood down upon your offices, blessed be the Lord. It is by His will we shall march and wail and gnash our teeth at you!
What about purple Jesus?
He's on the shelf next to Buddy Jesus.
I'm up for a half a hit, at least.
Purple Jesus is my nickname for my tallywhacker.
Hindus, take my open word challenge and tell me what do the origins of words Pew, Pee, Puk, Poo say about my people?
Replace hindus with muslims... much better.
100% atheist ism, goon.
Hey now..don't stray from your long gibberish rantings.
So answer since you bring up gibberish who will you be voting for- red or blue ?
So you haven't even thought out why?
Let me know when you have actually thought about it.
@answer
Who will you be voting for? What colors are on your national flag?
Oh now.. you're asking the correct line of thought.
A.s.swipe.
Just keep thinking.
What kind of numbskull asks someone that question, chrissie bit@hens? Why would you care?
@Tom Tom
It's because a nutcase is always concerned about his/her own environment. Never thinking there is a whole wide world out there.
chrissie's environment is an outhouse.
I suspect their is a foreign national pretending it is an American as if it had something to tell us. And I wonder what kind of a sick loser would have to do that, some poor pathetic wretch that is unwanted in its own country but doesn't have the balls to be a legitimate member of our land ? I prefer to think for myself as an American and unlike tom tom do not need a foreigner to do my thinking for me.
@chrissie, apparently, you need an adult to spell simple words for you.
@chris
Still being completely irrelevant I see.
@Tom Tom
Yea I know.
A.s.s.wipes are all the same. Have to torture them just to make them think.
Irrelevant, illiterate and ill-bred. That's our chrissie!
They're like mules: you have to smack 'em with a 2×4 just to get their attention.
Q: Why did chrissie stare at the orange juice container?
A: Because it said "Concentrate."
christopher hitchens,
"[I] do not need a foreigner to do my thinking for me."
Ah, but you do let those old-time foreign Middle Eastern Hebrews and their fantasy deity think for you!
How could anyone do any "thinking" for a brainless nitwit like chrissie, anyway?
christopher hitchens,
If you want a truly USA-bred religion you can go with Scientology... wholly made in the USA!
(I'd recommend Pastafarianism, but there is a bit of Italian cookin' involved there)
According to book of potted plants Fern sim, sun light ism, Green thumb, seed labels, potted plants oxygen loving Fertilizer sprouted in to new blooms else on front of tree parasite, at last rainfall Fertilizer looked at Sun lamp and smiled and growth was answered by Sun lamp, Fertilizer kissed soil, Fertilizer turned in to Sun lamp, and Sun lamp turned in to Fertilizer, ONE ON windlow shelf WAS NOT FERTILIZER BUT SUN LAMP, EVERY potted plants, hippie follower of potted plants Fern ism, sun light ism waters to as his Fern, sun light man potted plant. Visit GreenThumb.com to learn potted plantsism, partial light of grow lamp absolute plant food, by potted plants parasites.
So you can't answer it yourself?
best of hinduism, absurdity.
So that's a 'no'.
Thanks.
@answer
low light water ism medium attacker of parasite ism mist spray.
Nice gibberish.. got any others?
answer
word fondu is based on Latin word dippity doo, hot gooey, chips, great, chip dip, to be in greatness, pita chip, to be creamy to both of them, fondu, a noun in yummy, fonduism, way of yumminess.
Visit dippingisfun.com to learn about fonduism, deliciousnessity of fondu's, deliciousness to impose fonduism, veggie dipping on humanity by fonduism, cheese skin of truth absolute by dipper. Be a dipper, not a fondu, lactose intolerant like a fondu, double dipper.
Nice..more gibberish.
Keep them coming.. say something about 'muslims'.
answer
iPhones, invented by appleism,. corruption of level playing field fourth quarter earnings by madison avenue suites, money grubbing self interested, follower of madison avenue filthy cellular ism by corrupted executives, known as think tanks, translated and stolen by steve jobs in 1978 AD in HTML, cross platform, SML XML language, also known as extensible, part of book of ASP php ism labeled as middle ware. A way to justify madison avenue criminal Kings and self promotion Prophets, fortune grubbers as apple’s to rule over humanity.
Nice.
Keep doing the gibberish. Post some more.
@answer
Who will you be voting for?
The article title presents a False Dichotomy.
http://www.fallacyfiles.org/glossary.html
or prolapsed.net for the truth
beat hind of hindu, criminal red with a shoe, if it does not work, shaft his hind with rod of truth to turn him into blue, only way to make a hindu, criminal act like a human.