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 A CNN iReport essay on raising kids without God draws record-breaking number of comments.
January 18th, 2013
06:32 PM ET
Godless mom strikes a chord with parentsBy Daphne Sashin, CNN Deborah Mitchell remembers the time, when her boys were younger, and another mom asked her about her religious beliefs. Mitchell was raised Catholic but moved away from religion in her early 20s. She told the other mother that she didn’t go to church and didn’t even really believe in God. Then, she says, the recruiting started. “She used to call my house and tell me she was praying for me. She’d leave me messages and leave cards in my mailbox with scripture,” Mitchell says. “I do realize that she meant well, but at the same time, I know my views were seen as wrong. I needed to be ‘saved.’” Mitchell, a mother of two teenagers in Texas who feels “immersed in Christianity,” started a blog about raising her children without religion because she felt frustrated and marginalized. She didn’t want to feel so alone, she says. This week, she gained a whole new audience and the reassurance that she's not alone. Her essay on CNN iReport, “Why I Raise My Children Without God,” drew 650,000 page views, the second highest for an iReport, and the most comments of any submission on the citizen journalism platform. It starts:
Mitchell posted the essay detailing her seven reasons for raising her children without God on CNN iReport because she felt there wasn’t anyone else speaking for women or moms like her. As she sees it, children should learn to do the right things because they will feel better about themselves, not because God is watching. She asks questions like: If there was a good, all-knowing, all-powerful God, why would he allow murders, child abuse and torture? Lots of people disagreed with her. Tons. They flagged her iReport as inappropriate and criticized CNN for linking to her essay on the CNN.com homepage. But there were plenty of others who wrote thoughtful rebuttals, respectfully disagreeing with Mitchell while not foisting their own beliefs on her. Take, for instance, a Methodist dad, who said faith can be hard to nail down, but “not to avail ourselves of the power of something we don't completely understand is silly.” Others said Mitchell presented a simplistic view of religion. “Presentations such as these seem to ignore a substantial percentage of believers - well-educated, compassionate, liberal folk, Christian and non-Christian alike - who, I feel, are able to worship without being blind to the realities of the world, or without lying to their children about their understanding of these complexities,” wrote commenter RMooradian. “I'll be raising my children with God, but I understand those who cannot!” But Mitchell’s essay also struck a chord with hundreds of like-minded parents raising children in a world where lack of belief puts them in the minority, often even in their own family. “Thank you for writing this. I agree with everything you say, but I’m not brave enough to tell everyone I know this is how I feel,” a woman who called herself an “agnostic mommy of two in Alabama” posted in the comments. “Thank you for your bravery and letting me know I’m not alone.” It’s a growing group. One in five Americans is not affiliated with any religion, and that number has grown by 25% in the past five years, according to a survey by the Pew Forum on Religion and Public Life. Of that group, 88% said they were not looking for religion, although 68% of the unaffiliated said they believe in God. Brittany Branyon, an American graduate student and substitute teacher living in Germany, was also compelled to express her thanks to Mitchell. Branyon was raised Southern Baptist in Georgia and Alabama. In high school, when she began to question the theory of creation and befriended gay and lesbian students, she says her mother tried to perform an exorcism. “She opened all the windows and doors in the house, brought me to the door, held my shoulders and shook me while screaming, ‘Satan, get out of this child!’, ‘Satan, leave this child alone!’.” After moving away from the South, she and her husband “became more comfortable in our secular ways,” but still take criticism from family members. They are now expecting their first child. “Though we are elated to welcome our child into the world, we can’t help but dread the religious uproar that is to come from our families,” she wrote in an e-mail. Such an uproar is familiar to Carol Phillips, a stay-at-home mother in northern Virginia. When she gave birth to her first child, she said her family was shocked that the baby wasn’t baptized. She said her mother-in-law cried and told her the little girl’s soul would not go to heaven. Then there are the comments from strangers. Last year, Phillips said she and her daughter were at a birthday party when a tornado warning sounded. “We were all in the basement keeping safe. A little girl was saying baby Jesus will keep us safe. My daughter asked who Jesus was. The rest of the time was spent hearing ‘I'll pray for you sweetie, we can take you to church with us if you want,’” Phillips told CNN. Commenting on Mitchell’s iReport, Phillips said, “To live out loud and to speak freely about my beliefs brings many clucking tongues. I would think it’s easier to come out as gay than atheist.” Mitchell said she spent years studying the history of religion and does believe it has “an important place in our community.” She has told her children that she’ll be fine if they decide to join a church when they are older. She ended her essay:
After her post ran on CNN, Mitchell said she was encouraged by the number of people who agreed with her, or who disagreed but wanted to have a respectful discussion. “I’m not saying that everybody should think how I do. I’m saying the people that do should have a place in our society and have acceptance and respect,” she said. “I just want to have children grow up and be able to not be afraid to say ‘I don’t believe that,’ or ‘I’m not part of that.’” soundoff (15,081 Responses)« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 Next »
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The CNN Belief Blog covers the faith angles of the day's biggest stories, from breaking news to politics to entertainment, fostering a global conversation about the role of religion and belief in readers' lives. It's edited by CNN's Daniel Burke with contributions from Eric Marrapodi and CNN's worldwide news gathering team.  |
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For the masses here is some clarification. PLEASE STOP using Buddhism as a comparison to other religions. Buddha was a mortal man, NOT A GOD, stop referring to him as such. Buddhism teaches that life is NOT SIN BASED. While Buddhism maintains deities, they are numerous and there is NO creator.
Buddha transcended to a supernatural state, which effectively makes him a deity. Gods do not have to be creator gods.
Buddhism does actually presume a system of sin, though it is not called sin. That is the whole premise behind karma and samsara, that your bad behavior will punish you, and that the highest state you can achieve, nirvana, can only occur when you transcend desire, which effectively makes desire a sin.
I am a Buddhist so I'm pretty much up to speed ;o) I disagree with your assessment of Buddha. The teachings followed in Buddhism are the teachings of a mortal man, not the son of a god, and by no means an omnipotent god.
Mayla...Well said...Perhaps we need more former Buddhist's and Hindu's (those who received the Jesus of the Bible) to educate the West regarding the re-packaging of their former religion that is being embraced, for all practical intents and purposes, by even the atheist's herein – not to mention the unsuspecting, ignorant "religious" who are propagating its essential & fundamental tenants. Thank you for making the clear distinction in your post! JesusNotReligion
Mayla....if I have misunderstood your post as being pro-Jesus over and agaimst the false teaching of Buddhism then I retract my above comment to you...After re-reading your post I must confess that I am not sure what your are defending.
I am not defending anything, merely trying to clarify a common misconception that Buddhism is a god-based, sin-based, burn i hell or else 'religion.' Education doesn't seem to be high on the list of priorities when it comes to discussing such things.
......burn in hell............not burn i hell...............derp!
This whole God wants you to believe on Faith, so you are doing it for the right reasons and not to curry favor with it, would make a lot more sense IF the alternative wasn't ENDLESS DAMNATION.
ask God for faith and forgiveness, not yourself. That's the way you will receive it . You wont earn it wi
you are not damned. you have been justified by the blood of Christ. you condemn yourself through rejection.
Lets run some Vegas odds here. With tomorrow being the inauguration of Obama and MLK day, how many cities will be burned to the ground? Detroit and Camden for sure. Any others? Body count??? You guys want some skin in this game?
Sigh.
WOW! You can see the futures? A little bit racist, maybe? Your screen name appears to be appropriate.
The threats for riots and such were made against Romney winning. Try to keep up.
Is that a yes or a no?
Come on, you know when all those "Obama supporters" celebrate they torch the place.
And I call them supporters because most of them are not eligible to vote (prior felonies)
the human race, not what race are you. Where does this idea come from? evolution or creation?
There is a question to be answered, and no one seems capable of answering it, not even people who are supposed to have all of the answers: scientists, atheists, agnostics, rationalists, humanists, empiricists, etc. That is my point.
i don't know of anyone claiming to know all the answers, especially scientists...
i have no idea what you're talking about
Cite anyone in those groups of people who has ever claimed to have all the answers.
Veronica, there is far more than just *A* question to be answered, there are bazillions of them.
Honest people will settle for "nobody knows" if in fact nobody knows. Christians seem to be too insecure to do this. They prefer made-up fairy tales to an honest admission that the evidence isn't all in yet.
Notice how this undercuts science. Once you've convinced yourself that "God did it" is the answer, you stop looking for the REAL answer. Fortunately, science marches on, despite the heavy dead weight of religion trying to hold it back.
Veronica, why are you unable to come to grips with the fact that we don't know? Why would you think there "must" be an answer, and that we "must" have it now?
The problem is, religionists are so used to being bludgeoned with absolute answers from their religions that they cannot fathom a reality without them. So they reject science for continually improving our understanding of the universe, and embrace archaic religions.
No, christians think they have all the answers, in their book of fairy tales.
It is a simple logical trap that atheists set of theists. They claim to have no certain answers, except that religion is wrong. No need to prove anything, or answer anything beyond that. In fact, since you can't prove a negative, no responsibility to support their claims what-so-ever.
Not everyone who doesn't share your belief says that "religion is wrong." Only that it's wrong for those who believe to insist that the world be run according to their beliefs, never mind the Const itution or our country's separation of church and state.
Why would you expect scientists to explain philosophy to you? The "meaning of life" is philosophy, and the answer depends on which philosophical school you accept. I tend to go with the existentialists, in that life has no inherent meaning for the individual beyond survival and perhaps the species role of biological reproduction. Meaning therefore is the responsibility of the individual to determine. Most are not up to this task, and will instead simply follow standard behaviors or whatever was indoctrinated into them as children or elsewhere.
To be able to create a meaning for yourself, an individual must transcend the internalized voice of society, which is quite difficult, and to do some searing self-understanding, then do what you authentically are. The vast majority of people never get anywhere near authenticity, having failed to even become aware of how much of their behavior and choices are just mimicking the indoctrinated ideas of others.
There is no inherent meaning beyond survival and reproduction. Nothing about any attempt at meaning beyond that implies or proves a deity.
Gorsh, you do realize that the people who make the claim that God exists are the ones responisble for proving that claim, don't you? Indeed, it has been the spectacular failure of religious people to prove that claim to be even remotely true that allows atheists to dismiss your claims.
Trying to shift that responsibility of proof onto atheists is the same as leprechaun believers saying you are the one who must prove leprechauns don't exist. It's double nonsense, being neither your responsibility nor even possible to disprove the non-existent.
Do you want answers, Veronica, or do you want honest answers? If you just want comfort, then choose religion. But if you want truth, you need to be wiling for honestly researched and verified answers.
Personally, I want the truth.
Instead of just saying that something is an example of such-and-such fallacy, how about explaining WHY it is?
sure... although i would hope that once one knows what the fallacy is in the particular argument, they can connect the dots and realize what the issue being pointed out is
You got the answer in your last post : IT'S A LOADED QUESTION. It cannot be answered by the blanket statements that you unthinking religious prefer and reject science for not producing.
A Strawman is a caricature you create of what YOU believe your opposition believes not what they really do.YOU think Atheists secretly believe in God, but deny him to live a evil lifestyle, that is NOT true.
THIS TYPE OF PERSON IS NOTHING NEW. A YOUNG PIECE OF DUST THAT HAS SOMEHOW BECOME SMARTER THAN THE GOD OF AGES.
Yet christians make that claim everyday.
And you typing in ALL CAPS makes you appear more stupid than usual.
Your capslock is on.
The only difference is that one is a figment of your imagination, and the other exists in reality.
Turn off your caps lock, Randy. It makes you look stupider than you actually are.
You are nothing new, Randy. Humans have worshiped thousands of gods throughout history. There is not a single shred of evidence to support the existence of any of those gods - even yours. You have simply chosen to put your faith in the delusion which promises the greatest reward for the least amount of work: christianity.
I can Respect a Good God, I might even Revere such a being, but having to WORSHIP at pain of Damnation is getting pretty Tyrannical in my book.
Hey! Less thinky, more faithy!
^ Blind faith is stupidity, You use religion as an excuse not to think.
If you truly believe in a deity – you will worship regardless of your feelings as to the character of said deity.
That is not true, CNN Commenter. You can believe in something, even something more powerful than you, but not worship it if you think it is evil or unethical. It just takes personal courage.
Popping montheists' bubbles is like playin' with bubble wrap
I heard Joe Biden can fit an entire Idaho potato in his mouth
To the hedonistic atheists (or atheistic hedonists), I guess that the meaning of life is to eat as many steaks, drink as many beers, and have as many orgasms as possible in this life-time. Why take a billion years to evolve just for this?
Their philosophy doesn't make any sense to me. It's, um, er...irrational. It doesn't satisfy me. It leaves more to be desired.
Well we can shoot some guns too!
They should put a picture of you next to the "straw man" entry in the Oxford Dictionary.
sure, ok... but i don't know anyone like that
also, there are various forms of hedonism
anyway, even if you're right and there are some atheists that adopt a questionable philosophy based on hedonism, such as the one you described, what is your point? That there are some atheists that are also hedonists?
who cares?
There is no meaning of life itself. (Your) Life is what you make of it. Do whatever you please Veronica, but the natural world is meaningless and has no point.
This is one of the silliest things I've seen written here. Not believing in invisible gods or spirits doesn't lead to hedonism. In fact look at the record, there are endless cases of religious people whom publicly talk about morals and values then behind closed doors are womanizing, boozing, stealing and committing fraud. Those of us whom don't believe in invisible gods find that, in the end, the best way to live life is to realize we are interdependent and we must all rely upon each other to create an honest world where everyone can live. Atheists and agnostics like myself find that because we must live in a world with diverse beliefs, and we cannot rely upon an invisible god to make this world better, the best way to live is with integrity and ethics. I learned a long time ago that there are equal amounts of good and and bad people to be found in every "category" of human, regardless of religious beliefs, or ethnicity, or gender, or socioeconomic status, or level of education, or the language they speak. Look at any group or category of people, and there will be good people in that group, bad people in that group, honest and dishonest people within that group... as well as hedonists and altruists within that group.
Why don't unicorns eat twelve-leaf clovers? There is a question here and the filthy hellbound atheists are dodging it!
Being filthy is better than hypocrisy. At least I don't have to follow a religious philosophy where I have to love my neighbor. This is aimed at you devoted.
What makes you think (and I use the word "think" with reservations) that atheists view life as a series of physical pleasures and nothing more? I'm beginning to think that whoever called you "stupid" was right. Atheists are no different than anyone else, you dim bulb. They simply don't see evidence that a god exists. Most of them have families, love and teach their children to be good people, try to be good citizens and neighbors, work at their jobs, pay taxes, take vacations once in a while, and generally live just like anyone else. Their lives have meaning here and now, unlike yours, apparently. If the only thing that gives your life meaning is the belief that you go to heaven after you die, your life here and now must really suck.
Veronica, maybe you should get up off your knees, quit worshipping something that isn't there and try some of those things you mentioned instead of knocking them. What people do with there life and where they go when they pass is none of your business because i've got news for you... there is no such thing as hell! Life is about relationships and experiences and my bet is, you're too scared to get out there and experience those things for yourself because it's obvious that you live in fear of what's to come in an afterlife... we don't care! we live, and that is something that the religious will never understand nor have the courage to understand. never since the dawn of man has there ever, ever, ever been any proof of any of the near 3,000 gods created by man and if you don't think that's unusual that have fun living a very boring life worshipping something that isn't there... just keep your beliefs in your home, that's all we ask.
I'm sorry that your humanity is disappointing to you, Veronica. I'm sorry that you don't feel special enough.
I think my humanity and my one life are enough. But then, I'm just an atheist, busy with hedonistic activities like working, commuting, paying bills and taxes, being a good neighbor, doing housework, and occasionally having a drink with friends. Gosh, my life is just one big party.
You don't have to go to church to believe in God. Many churches are way out of the main stream. Just as old time religion, you can read the Bible in your house. You may be enlightened.
God is identical to Nature, end of story...the rest is monotheistic nonsense sold as an evolutionary coping tool for childish adults
http://youtu.be/jMYIl5b-paY
Please check out the Magis Center of Reason and Faith.
and then what?
What's so nonsensical about a very good question: do scientists know the meaning of life?
"When they're threatened by your intelligence, they will call you stupid."
go on wikipedia and search for "loaded question"
You're stupid. And your lack of intelligence is evidenced by your question, not refuted by it.
Your life will have exactly the meaning you give it. The need to be special is a vanity, not a necessity.
who says there's a meaning to life? that's YOUR question... and who's life are you talking about. what about a cow or a horse or a bug? those represent life too... do they have meaning? who cares?!!!
http://youtu.be/IFOTnBz-PCk
Why do children get Santa, The Easer Bunny, The Tooth Fairy, but adults only get God? Doesn't seem fair at all.....Then again, if there was a God, things might just be fair in this world........Nobody has a plan for us except for Mr. Karma and Lady Luck
...and who judges good and bad karma?...what source of absolute truth determines good and evil?...and to what end does "lady luck" orchestrate events in our life if in the end we all end up dead and in the same lifeless, non-existent state. Yours is a suicidal, fatalistic worldview with no real meaning, justice or justification for this existence. My heart grieves for you, as I recall holding your empty, hopeless view. May JesusNotReligion open your eyes to what you are really saying and promoting herein,and may you know "the truth that sets us free" (John 8:32).
What people are not seeing is that there is duality in all this conversation – A God or not a God. Black or White. Heaven or Hell. What if these 2 things come from one source that is beyond any concept of god? And what if this is the place where science and religion are actually 1 thing? It is possible. I have experienced it and so have others. Advaita Vedanta philosophy explains this. The problem with people who want to believe in "God" is that they are emotionally attached. You have to see through the emotional body to overcome it. Detachment. If there is you and something greater than you then there again are 2 things. A person to be saved and a savior. But there is only one thing. And that one thing is both inside you as an individual and the entire universe. Atman (individual soul) and Brahman (universal soul) are the same thing. But in order to experience this you MUST be willing to allow there the possibility that there is no god. It will free you and your life will be entirely blissful. Regardless of what arises – war, love, stress, enjoyment. It is all you and you can savor each flavor without judgment. You can understand why Sandy Hook situations arise and know that it is simply happening because people do not know their true nature and insist on rights and wrongs and continuing to need saving, continuing to need to suck on their binky. Own your power people!!!! Be willing to call BS on yourself. To be truly honest. Heaven is here waiting for you to enjoy.
Yet another loony with all the answers.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Peh-UvZqPkE
Here is a poem that will make all you atheist deniers realize the truth of Jesus Christ.
Do not puncture a loon
Oh mouse-like mattress!
The spleen shrieks.
Our auctioneers rotate
Just before the banshee strangles a turbot.
The butterflies shout "Wow!"
Terribly.
False goats are vicious
Though not really radioactive.
My bugle-player stupidly
Garottes the Viking warrior.
Surely unsound gorillas read newspapers?
A drenched turbot shrieks.
My cliche-ridden banshee wobbles indefinitely
Disguised as a lumpy passer-by.
Never consult a weasel
Oh ye auctioneers!
Surely the anglers plague rubber ducks?
Our turbot catches a train.
Loofahs are plump.
Oysters are bouncy.
The scarlet policeman nocturnally pummels wicket-keepers.
This sounds like something my friend AB, whom I miss terribly, would write.
Or, perhaps Jill, who is equally brilliant.
Thank you.
I am convinced.
That is by far the most sensible pro-Christianity essay I've seen on this website all day.
Pilate said to Jesus, "What is truth?"...And the Truth was staring him in the face...already beaten and bruised and on His way to the Cross for sinners just like him...How ironic...This is love beyond our comprehension, and still the mocking continues as does the testimony of God's grace through his fallible people who offer it unconditionally to all without prejudice: "For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God"...all need this Savior, Jesus (not religion), "who for the sake of the joy before Him endured the cross...for all who will believe".
Sounds like Vogon poetry to me...
Beautifully illustrated... and inspired by heaven, my dear prophet.
not everyone may believe in god, but im pretty sure everyone believes akira and sam stone are mentally retarded.
Because you are John Q. Public, whose opinions and outlook are shared by everybody who has ever lived and will ever live.
Why, allen? Because you make absurd statements without foundation and I call you out on it, I'm retarded?
Obviously you don't know the definition of retarded in addition to ignorance of capitalization and punctuation.
I don't agree, allen. But I do find you to be petty and childish.
Allen, why am I not remotely surprised that you are SURE of things you cannot possibly have any knowledge of?
I beg to differ
Well, allen, dear, you're wrong. I believe Akira and sam are both smarter than you are by leagues.