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 Brant Hansen, a host on Christian radio, says his Asperger's syndrome once made him feel like an alien at church.
October 19th, 2013
10:28 AM ET
'Mr. Spock goes to church': How one Christian copes with Asperger's syndromeOpinion by Brant Hansen, special to CNN [twitter-follow screen_name='branthansen'] (CNN) - In the book “Jim and Caspar Go to Church,” an atheist turns to a Christian minister as they're watching a Sunday morning church service and earnestly asks, "Is this what Jesus told you guys to do?" I've grown up in churches and I'm a Christian, and I'm right there with the atheist. I honestly don't get the connection. (To be fair, I've grown up on Earth, too, and there are times that I don't understand any part of this place.) You see, years ago, I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome - and like a lot of "Aspies," sometimes I'm convinced that I've landed on the wrong planet. For those of you who don't know the medical lingo, Asperger's syndrome is an autism spectrum disorder, but not as severe as what most people think of as autism. It basically comes down to this: those "normal human" rules for things like eye contact, when to smile, personal distance - we just don't get them. What's more, Aspies like me don't like those rules. They make no sense to us. So usually, we just say stuff - bluntly - and stare uncomfortably at the ground. That's how we roll. But it gets even trickier for people of faith like me. Feeling out of place at work is one thing. Feeling like an alien at church is a whole other matter. Imagine Mr. Spock at an evangelical Christian tent revival, and you’ll get the idea.
And my father is a pastor, so I was in church a lot. Multiple times, each week, every week, I found myself wishing I'd be moved by the worship music, or that I could shut off my skeptical mind during the sermons. I'd see people in church services, Christian concerts and Bible camps overcome by emotion and enraptured with charismatic speakers, and I wondered why I didn't feel that way. Why did I always feel like a cold observer? After going to college, I was convinced my lack of feeling meant I was missing something, spiritually, so I joined charismatic Christian groups in which emotional manifestations of the Holy Spirit are common. I desperately wanted to have what they had - an emotional experience of God's presence - and asked them to pray over me. It didn't work. When I didn’t move with the Holy Spirit or speak in tongues, they told me it was because I had rejected God. I worried that it was the other way around: God had rejected me. Maybe I felt like an alien because I deserved it. I deserved to be alienated, irretrievably and forever far from God. I tried to pray, read the Bible, and do all the "right stuff." But I still felt out-of-touch. I wondered if I was so broken, such a misfit that God simply took a look at me and decided to move on. I wish I’d known then that I was an Aspie. And that God loves Aspies. I still feel alienated from many parts of Christian culture, but Jesus himself finally reached me. And man, did I feel that. To people who are beaten down or befuddled by religious rules, Jesus offers something that no one else does: rest. "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest," he says. And he sums up the entirety of complex and confusing religious laws with this: “Love God, and love your neighbor.” Beautiful. Even children can understand that. The Bible tells a story about a man who approaches Jesus and admits that he has faith, but also strong doubts. "Help me in my unbelief," he asks Jesus. Jesus doesn't blast him. He loves him. To me, Jesus is the only one who really makes any sense. Oddly enough, considering my medical condition, I'm now a radio personality on a network that plays Christian music. It’s a beautiful fit, in many ways, because I get to talk to many people who also don’t fit in, and wonder if God loves them. It’s true, though, others won’t understand me. I know that. I’m still an alien in the American Christian subculture. Each evening I retreat from it, and I go straight to the Gospels. It's not out of duty that I read about Jesus; it's a respite. I long for it, because I'm awash in two strange and baffling cultures, both the irreligious and religious. And I long for someone I can finally understand, and someone who might finally understand me. Brant Hansen is a radio host on the Air1 network, where his show airs from 3-7 p.m. CT. He also writes a popular blog at air1.com. The views expressed in this column belong to Hansen. soundoff (3,030 Responses)« Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 Next »
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I thought all the liberal lefties were supposed to be about acceptance and peace. Instead I see a bunch of whining, cur$ing, demeaning posts. I expected better, even from you.
So anyone who doesn't believe in your magic sky fairy is a " liberal lefties" now? Much like the GOP you lose all legitimacy once you go down that road.
First off, the GOP lost its legitimacy long ago, as most would agree. Secondly, you further prove my point with the whole "sky fairy" comment. You don't have to believe but respecting ones beliefs is an act that I can be fairly sure you haven't quite mastered.
> "respecting ones beliefs"
People deserve respect. Beliefs never do. They are either proven or not.
People should be given respect...beliefs have to earn it.
To Jones and Cheese, no religious beliefs are proven, Christians cannot show someone God exists but Atheists cannot prove He does not exist. But there are those who have proven themselves unworthy of respect, Hitler, Stalin, Ted Bundy, Ariel Castro, you get the idea. Your fundamental idea behind your statement is flawed, and repeated
Not sure what the point is, since Hitler at one time aspired to the priesthood . . . . ?
I don't have to respect hate.
You definitely deserve respect, but not your beliefs. If people call you out on unsubstantiated nonsense, you don't get to hide behind a claim that they don't respect you. There are many objections to the "sky fairy" caricature, but offence is not one of them. Although I am an atheist myself, may I humbly suggest that in future you put down your "offence card" and simply represent your case instead? For example, you could perhaps describe the "sky fairy" as a "straw man" - an attempt to misrepresent your position to make it easier to attack. This is something that most rational thinkers can understand, whereas a simple claim of offence will never be taken seriously.
Finkle,
You are right, no religious beliefs are proven, therefore there is no need to give them the respect of being fact, or pretending it is perfectly rational to believe supersti.tous cr@polla. If someone states something as fact when you and I both know it is not fact, I have no obligation to "play along" as if I am talking to a 4 year old about Santa. We are adults and if your belief is not able to stand scutiny...too bad, grow up. You obviously agree with this since you have no problem disparaging "liberal lefties"...but you want to put religious belief in a special catagory beyond criticism. You talk out of both side of your mouth.
Oh and your non sequitor insinuation about atheism and criminals and despots shows you are adept at red herring/straw man arguments...way to go.
Hey Finkle, is it true that all trolls live in their mom's basement?
Your question does not make sense to the topic of conversation. Maybe you should google it.
Oh come on, Finkle. You sound like an expert on trolling.
Shalom, Finkle. You picked up on that, yes. It seems that there is a lot of vitriolic name calling going on in this thread. When there is no genuine argument from logic, the alternative is to use terms like idiot, etc. L'hit ra;ot, chaver.
KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN
I cant Believe there are people here Bashing Brant cause of the article I have aspergers too and I also met Brant before he is a very nice guy and he means very well I can relate to him in many ways so my message to the people hating on him is go read To Kill a Mocking Bird cause you cant judge a person until you walked a mile in their shoes
Don't hate the playa, hate the game.
You do not HAVE to "be" a "christian", Brant. You do not HAVE to go to church. In fact going to church and admitting you are a "christian" is not what a " christian" would do. They prefer to remain anonymous and be called or labelled nothing. They do not like to draw attention to themselves, unlike you. And what you call "Asperger's syndrome" is just a fancy label for people who speak the truth who have no shame.
You obviously have no idea what you're talking about.
You obviously do not have ears to hear. It is interesting YOU THINK you know what I am talking about. Another i d i o t. Attend to you own confusion and you may learn something new about yourself, you with the small mind.
As a christian you obviously don't follow the teachings of Jesus then.
Making assumptions will never help you discover your own myopia. I never said I was a Christian and if you think you are go stand naked in front of a mirror and tell yourself that and maybe you will discover how really a s i n i n e it is to call yourself anything.
When I'm standing naked in front of the mirror you don't want to know the things I call myself. Especially when its leopard underwear night.
Hello, ANON. Right. Christians don't want to draw attention to themselves, but to Christ. We do that by "witnessing" (the term we use) as to what He has done in our lives, just as Brant is doing. We "witness" because He of Whom we are witnesses told us to do so. As for Asbergers being a synonym for telling the truth or being blunt, it's easy to write off a syndrome when one is not suffering from it.
"Hello, ANON. Right. Christians don't want to draw attention to themselves, but to Christ. "
Riiiiiggghttt, thats why the Romans refused to kill christians after they started flocking to them to be "martyrd".
God works in mysterious ways....u have a great calling.Keep listening to JESUS
Why would a god let someone feel alienated in a church. You call it a mysterious god? I call it you making excuses. You're a joke like every other religious zealot on the earth
"God works in msterious ways"...the catchall of religious rationalization.
What makes you think he listens to "Jesus"? Maybe he is mocking "Jesus". Ever consider that?
I listen to Jesus occasionally. Especially when he says he needs more money or he'll quit mowing my lawn.
Hey, Steel. Wrong Jesus. Yours is probably from Mexico or Central America. The one Brant refers to is from Bethlehem.
Which one is from Nazerath?
hey john nice try for a comeback but no. just no.
Did you check his papers? Immigration and Homeland Security won't be happy. Their touchy about middle easterners. I wouldn't hire him if I were you.
The most mysterious thing about your god's works is how adult humans actually believe in him when he's just another of the thousands of unsubstantiated gods that humans have worshiped.
Extortion (also called shakedown, outwresting, and exaction) is a criminal offense of obtaining money, property, services or something of value from a person, enti.ty, or insti.tution, through coercion.
Worship Jesus or be damned to hell for eternity.
Definitely sounds like a like it or lump it scene to me.
Wrong. You were bound for hell from the moment you were born (because you were born in sin). Jesus came that you might have life. You can either accept his help and assistance and be saved, or continue on the hell. No one is forcing you to do anything...
Opposing View,
Since it's HIGHLY likely that you don't believe and support everything in the Bible, do you think you are bound for hell?
and you are insane. i hate this planet. i want off.
Don't worry, ZD. You will be off this planet soon enough. What then?
at which point i will be dead and thankful
How can you be thankful if you are dead? At best, you'll be....inert. Now there is one helluva expectation.
I don't deserve to expect more than my life. No one on earth does. No one is capable of the responsibility. And 95% of most people are not capable of admitting their incapacity. Our mentality, our evolution, this universe, is not designed for perfection. There is simply no such thing. Are there questions? yes. It is arrogant presumption to assume or believe that a god made us and that we look like it. Its simply arrogant. Enjoy your life for what it is. die peacefully knowing it was fun.
I will be thankful that the end is soon when it is. I feel sorry for everyone here, this is all wrong.
"You were bound for hell from the moment you were born (because you were born in sin). "
And if this isn't the most ridiculous notions from Christianity that should make one run away from it, I can't imagine was else would be worse.
notion
Yes, the truth would sound ridiculous to someone who is not even saved…
Psalms 51:5 – Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.
1 Corinthians 1:18 – For the preaching of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us which are saved it is the power of God...
John 8:43 – (Jesus speaking) Why do ye not understand my speech? even because ye cannot hear my word. 44 (He then answered that question) Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do….
The more this guy posts, the more I think Poe.
opposing view. He thinks he's special and given divine rights. So clueless its incredible.
Ahhh....God as a mob boss....."do what I want or I break your legs...it is completely your choice".
You are an i d i o t.
So this god of yours, since he created us in his own image... does that mean that he is a sinner too?
So, let me get this straight... god, who created everything, sent himself down to to save us from the sinful state he created us in, and then he went back to heaven to watch us suffer until the rapture...
Awwww, what a swell guy!
Hey Boston. I quote a missionary who was killed by the Auca Indians in Ecuador in 1953. Nate and Jim (not sure which is the one I quote) gave their lives willingly to bring the good news of eternal life in Christ. the quote: "that man is no fool, who gives what he can not keep to gain what he can not lose". Hardly in the category of extortion.
John,
No issue with the carrot, it's the stick that is immoral.
Who is this idiot who thinks dying instantly turns lies into truth? What a clueless fuck.
That's Right I SOONs someone open the Hart
JESUS IS RIGHT THERE TO GUIDE YOU
BECAUSE THE SON OF GOD IS LOVE AND FORGIVNES NOT REVENGE
ROMANS 12:19 "Vengeance is mine . . . saith the Lord. "
Why does your god need vengence? Sounds pretty petty.
Not MY god – I was quoting scripture disproving someone who claimed God is not vengeful.
Oh Sorry, .....Opposing View sure like that one though.
Great reply, denstre... Here's another one...
Hebrews 10:31 – It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God...
you people make me sick and i can't wait for all of your relgions and for YOU to die out.
Yes, we do have the tendency to make devils sick, that is true. LOL. But no more sicker than we are of you...
Hey ZD. Sorry you are feeling sick. Maybe take a swig of Alka Seltzer. As for waiting for all religious people and their religiouns to die off, don't hold your breath. Just the Christian part has been around for 2K years, and no sign of its evaporation.
My favorite part of Brant Hansen's blog was the picture of Spock. The read lacked depth, and though the subject matter had potential, in the end it wasn't worth the time t took to write the blog. I learned nothing new.
Funny thing is when I listen to Brant on the radio is, I totally get him!!! He sounds like a really neat and caring guy!!! .. So, I just thought we had the same personality when I hear him on the radio. I have never been diagnosed with as bergs, but I have experienced rejection early in life, which can really lower your self esteem. But God is the remedy to that with His Great Love. It is so nurturing, I wish everyone could experience and accept it! <3monica beck
You like his face-pubes. I can tell. Be sure and send him a nude pic of yourself to show you really enjoy his radio show.
You do not need a make believe "God" to care for yourself and have esteem. Do something for someone else without looking for reward and you just may discover a new independence.
The world is not ready for Vulcans, or any other visitors.
He's nothing like spock. Spock is actually intelligent.
This article was a waste of time...what's your point? If God doesn't exist why are you wasting so much time writing about him?
CNN has a belief blog...what exactly were you expecting? Just how thick are you?
You mean there aren't enough brains in that noggin for you to realize that if people are writing about him, then he must exist. Only a fool would assume otherwise...
Psalm 14:1 – The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God.
Hey,Someone. You bring up a point that has puzzled me for a long time. Why do people who don't believe in God get their panties in a wad about Someone Who doesn't exist. I don't believe in Zeus, but I enjoy Greek mythology. We have in Spanish a saying: Chilla el perro que la pulga pica. The dog which the flea bites is the one who barks.
Nobody sane gives a crap about your fake god. What people get mad about is the criminal acts you commit using religion as an excuse. Who cares what Santa is supposedly doing? You really don't understand how something that doesn't exist isn't going to be a logical target for anger or hate. You, on the other hand, have probably done things I'd be glad to kick you for doing.
Your fake god? Not so much.
Dogs bark for many different reasons. That's a stupid saying.
Great post. I love listening to Brant on Air 1. He's such a goof. He's my favorite DJ.
Why in the world would you actually WANT to force yourself to believe obviously ridiculous mythology about the Imaginary Sky Fairy?
You were sensible enough to realize how silly it all was, yet you tried to force yourself to believe something inherently unbelievable.
I do not understand the depth of desperate approval-seeking that would prompt you to do such a thing.
Bet you'll never guess why...
rosethorne… Obviously, you weren't too hard to convince, since you've already fell for all that crazy nonsense that God doesn't exist. What fool sold you that pack of lies anyway? Yet, without a shred of evidence to back it up…
Also, I don't know which planet you live on, but I don't know even one person who believes in an "invisible sky fairy" (maybe you do). But I know a whole lot of people who believes in Jesus Christ, the Son of the living God. And he clearly wasn't invisible…
Opposing View,
You're busy trashing others, but when it comes to PROOF of God's existence, you have ZERO. Zip. Nada. Nothing. Nill. Just HOPE there is.
Mr. Spock has a lot in common with Jesus–They're both fictional characters.
Jesus was not a fictional character. Don't deceive yourself of that just because he is the key figure of a religion you hate. Jesus was a historical man, a real person, just like Mohammed and Buddha. However, different from Mohammed and Buddha, Jesus rose from the dead. How do I know this? Many people conclude that Jesus died on a cross. Yes he did. And we know this because of the gospels according to Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. Interestingly, all four gospels also conclude that Jesus rose from the dead. Not only that, he appeared to more than 500 people! I would understand if you don't believe Jesus is the Son of God. That's a powerful claim that even the religious Jews of the day could not accept. But to say Jesus was fictional is absolutely ignorant. Jesus is a real person and even you can come to Him.
Jesus may have been an actual person but there is no contemporary accounts of his existence. All accounts of his life come long after his death, and you have to wonder why. The Romans were excellent recorders of history. Surely if Jesus did even half of what was credited to him in the bible, some of that would have made public record. But there is nothing.
If you were there reporting for CNN then you can tell us the facts. Otherwise you just do not know and are offering only what sounds good to you. Now if you shared a past life with Jesus then you may have something to share. Otherwise shut up about what you know nothing about.
Amen to that, anonymous. I completely agree with you. Tallulah13 is just a servant of Lucifer and troll that goes from forum to forum spouting utter nonsense in an attempt to draw attention to himself. He's on my "ignore" list...
Opposing View's Ignore List includes everyone asking him questions about the Bible that he is clueless to answer or asking about his hypocritically religious views. When you like to give advice but are incapable of answering questions, then just ignore as if that fools anyone.
Hey stupid, "Tallulah" is a girl's name. She kicked your ass. You are too stupid for words.
I get the gut feeling that "Opposing View" is just a Poe, trolling for fun because there are no college football games on Sunday.
Thanks Crom. It always makes me laugh when people think Tallulah is a guys name. There was one person who was convinced I was a muslim guy, I suspect because of the -lah at the end of the name.
Well said.
Wise men (& women) still seek Jesus.
!!Brant!!! i <3 you! you are sooo awesome! yeah..i feel the same..i might have Aspergers, too..i dont get social cues..:P i was always shy as little girl...stil am a little shy,..but God is soooo good! He <3 everyone! even the greedy, the lusty, the gluttons! because Jesus hung out, not with the religious leaders, but the sinners, the lowest of the low! amen!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GHf7TD4qwjk
Good stuff!
@Christian7
"Well Duh, I promise you will not be given proof of God until you are judged and it is too late. You will not enter heaven because someone has given you any proof."
There it is folks, Christian7 has no proof.
Ha!
Yes, he revealed his true depravity right there all in the open for all to see.
It's like hearing someone demand a child to molest. It's disgusting. Reality TV eat your heart out.
Wow, really? Wow... I'm sorry for whatever religious experience(s) led you to draw a parallel between child molestation and belief in God. I can honestly tell you that has not been my experience. My childhood of abuse and neglect bears no resemblance whatsoever to my relationship with God.
LOL – you are terrorized by an invisible bully and that's not abusive? Wow. Your level of denial is exceptional.
But your need for a parent figure that is excepting(god) comes from your abusive childhood.
Furthermore, his version of god is one of a repulsive, disgusting monster, requiring to be worshiped by his unworthy creations, and who won't give you any proof at all of his existence but will burn you in molten lava for eternity if you don't ignore the logic and skepticism he gave you. How does this fundi even get out of bed in the morning?
"I tried to pray, read the Bible, and do all the "right stuff." But I still felt out-of-touch.
I wondered if I was so broken, such a misfit that God simply took a look at me and decided to move on.
I wish I’d known then that I was an Aspie. And that God loves Aspies.
I still feel alienated from many parts of Christian culture, but Jesus himself finally reached me."
Very true, ain't that the truth, the Bible is replete with examples of God reaching out in the most unusual of circ.umstances. Be it the Samaritan woman, the tax collector or blind Bartamaeus.
Kudos on a well written article that most people can relate to!
Apparently most Americans have Aspergers now?
The man finds a passage in the bible that brings him comfort and that is evidence of God?
He was asked to write an article, not a book. Evidence of God loving us misfits fills the whole Bible in many of the histories of people. There are countless examples of His love and compassion for man. Hopefully, someone will be able to talk to you about Jesus. A good place to start is 1(800)NeedHim or needhim.org.
Misfits? Seriously? You enjoy adhering to a religion that refers to it's followers as misfits, unworthy, sinful, and sheep? Are you into BDSM as well? Enjoy feeling worthless.
Are these examples of his love you are referring to?
Now go and attack Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and do not spare them. But kill both man and woman, infant and nursing child, ox and sheep, camel and donkey. (1 Samuel 15:3)
The people of Samaria must bear their guilt, because they have rebelled against their God. They will fall by the sword; their little ones will be dashed to the ground, their pregnant women ripped open. (Hosea 13:16)
"Hopefully, someone will be able to talk to you about Jesus."
Btw, I went to a Christian school for 8 yrs, Jesus came up now and then.
I have been a "misfit" all my life. I think I've always embraced that part of myself. I certainly do now. And while I spent most of my childhood thinking that I was a christian, I never really needed a supernatural friend in order to be happy. I've generally been quite comfortable in my own company. As an adult, I feel quite sad for those who need to believe a myth in order to feel as though they belong.
I guess Susan must be that doll on the Island of Misfit Toys. Soon Rudolph will bring Santa to the Island and Susan will be given to a little girl for her very own. Spoiler alert: Everyone lives happily ever after.
To Well Duh: Yes, I am proud to believe in a God that loves the misfits, the unworthy, the sinful, the sheep. This has nothing to do with "liking bdsm" as you put it. This has everything to do with a longing to be loved even when a lot of people would shy away.
It's hard for people to understand how pain and suffering can exist in the world if God does, too. The short answer is, we don't know why God allows bad things to happen, like my childhood of abuse. The long answer might not make sense if I wrote it allout, because it didn't make sense to me until I grew up and finally understood that everything that happened made me into the person I am today and, while I'd have chosen another path for myself if I'd had the choice, I couldn't have planned out a better way for me to become the person I am today. Today I help people who can't stand up for themselves and help those who can find the right choices.
It's long been a discussion in my house: What exactly was wrong with that doll on the Island of Misfit Toys? Eventually, we decided that she was there because nobody wants a doll that complains all the time.
A disease is something that remains in the body after death and can be determined in an autopsy.
incorrect. There are many forms of disease. Not all are physical. Many are mental, and end when the brain ceases functioning.
With a proper brain scan, I would expect there to be common problems within the brain that would show up among people with similar diagnoses for any such thing. Don't we have the technology yet? I thought we could scan the hell out of everything these days. Perhaps they have not yet mapped out how these problems occur and how they manifest within the different areas of the brain. But there is still a common narrative for some things, at least. But no one wants to talk about mental health and getting people treated better, it seems.
Some religious think mental illness is caused by demons. They are no better than cretinous peasants in the Dark Ages who know nothing and think everything is caused by "spirits". They don't even see their own mental problems as a problem but think "god" is "testing" them or some such nonsense.
Unfortunately, the nearly pandemic mental disease that causes people to behave like paranoid schizophrenics with mass delusions, does not yet show up in a discernable way in brain scans, so there is as yet no cure.
Other than logic, of course.
I would think brain scans for mental disorders would be useless when one is deceased.
I went to church with my family every single Sunday till I was 19 and left home...I saw it for what it was at twelve and just went to make my parents happy. I am glad I was able to reason that it was all just a made up story by man, no god, no heaven, no hell, just one big con game.
@loan...
nope
@nope
yup
The first lie I ever told was to get out of going to church at the age of 9, because I knew it was all a bunch of BS. That lie was "I believe, I just don't need church to make me believe" or something along those lines. I see people using that one as adults all the time, it makes me sad 🙁
Loathestheright… I hate to tell you this, but you've been sold a huge pack of lies (better to hear it from me now, than to hear it when you arrive in hell). And you fell for all those lies because that is exactly what you wanted to hear and wanted to believe (Lucifer trapped you by telling you what you wanted to hear).
No sane person would even fall for such lies because there is too much truth available. Return to church now before it is too late. And I hope you find your way. Because if you do not return to church and find the true path to Christ, then all that awaits you is eternal death and destruction…
Yeah because 30 years of honest disbelief is totally a justifiable reason to punish someone for ETERNITY. Try not to gloat too hard when you're up there watching them burn eh?